Au pair STUNNED by household’s prolonged listing of guidelines for watching youngsters

An au pair is second guessing a potential supply of employment after receiving an egregiously lengthy listing of guidelines from a household who’d expressed curiosity in hiring her.

The lady shared her dilemma – plus seven screengrabs that captured the complete algorithm despatched to her – to Reddit looking for steering, titling the publish: ‘SHOULD I RUN OR MATCH? NEED ADVICE.’

‘Hey everybody! Right now, I’m going by means of the rematch course of and have already related with three households. One household specifically has proven loads of curiosity in me, and I actually loved speaking to the host mother – they appear like such a beautiful household,’ the au pair started in her publish to the Aupairs subreddit.

‘However, after our dialog, she despatched me a algorithm by way of electronic mail that struck me as a bit strict. I may use some recommendation as I’m unsure if I’m overreacting or if there is a trigger for concern.’

The listing despatched by the mom laid out a complete of 83 guidelines, organized below completely different headings — together with ‘guidelines,’ ‘exterior guidelines,’ ‘pool guidelines,’ ‘au pair automotive guidelines’ and ‘au pair common guidelines.’ 

In equity to the household, lots of the guidelines appeared cheap — together with ‘Avoid being overly loud’ and ‘No smoking or vaping or medicine together with weed.’

At the identical time, lots of the acknowledged guidelines appeared so apparent they arguably did not must be put in writing.

These included, ‘Stay out of the road when vehicles are coming,’ ‘Always know the place the children are,’ making certain the children have their seatbelts buckled when the automotive is in movement, and ‘no ingesting water from the pool.’

But a number of of the principles struck the au pair job applicant as overly strict — significantly within the context of an inventory that was already 83 guidelines lengthy.

For instance, one rule demanded that the au pair ‘be useful even in case you are off obligation, in case you are round.’

Another that stirred controversy: ‘No Phone, Period. Put your telephone away when you’re on obligation. Find a spot to place it so it won’t distract you and depart it there. Set a particular ring so it is the host household calling.’ 

The household’s au pair would even be forbidden from ‘doing private duties’ whereas ‘on obligation.’

A separate rule instructed the au pair to ‘bathe earlier than round folks’ after ‘coming house from journey’ in order to ‘keep away from spreading germs’ – a directive that, whereas not wildly unreasonable on the floor, does appear unnecessarily dictatorial as to the private hygiene of an grownup family staffer. 

Yet one other rule forbade any company of the au pair – whose hypothetical go to would already require preapproval from the employers – to eat any meals within the family. ‘If you’ve gotten associates over, they’re answerable for personal meals until there’s a particular circumstance,’ the rule states.

The ‘au pair common guidelines’ additionally put ahead a curfew of midnight ‘in case you are staying at our home,’ including: ‘If staying the evening out and you’re employed the subsequent day, curfew is 8 hours previous to your scheduled work time.’

The au pair would even be anticipated to ‘preserve private objects out of sight’ within the ‘shared lavatory’ they’d be anticipated to make use of. 

Users flooded the publish with greater than 2,400 feedback providing their take to the unique poster – OP for brief.

‘If most of this listing is widespread sense, why does it make me so uncomfortable (run),’ one wrote, with another person responding: ‘It’s as a result of whereas a lot of the listing is widespread sense, the 5-10% that is not is actually actually dangerous and reveals no willingness to compromise or be welcoming to an au pair.’

Another commenter chimed in: ‘”No willingness to be welcoming” Bingo.’

One particular person provided: ‘We do not have an au pair or nanny however I’d prefer to suppose I’d be a dream mother to work for if we did. That being stated, I can’t fathom ever sending one thing like this. Like actually something anyplace close to this. I’d preserve wanting.’

To this, OP jokingly responded: ‘Can you be my host mother?’

Someone else concurred of the listing: ‘Too many guidelines. I agree re telephone as a result of our toddler has been harm a number of instances when our final AP was on her telephone. That is smart. Numerous the principles make sense. But not letting your pals eat meals when they’re over? Things like which can be simply impolite.’

‘Be useful even when you’re off obligation,’ one Redditor identified, who added two sweat-faced emojis in imagined exasperation on the rule. 

The OP’s responses to lots of the feedback have been much more revealing of the less-than-ideal nature of the possible job state of affairs.   

The gig, she defined, would solely pay a mere weekly stipend of $200. 

Referencing the rule articulating that the au pair would not be allowed to take the household’s automotive any farther away than Fredericksburg, i.e. inside a 25 mile radius, OP talked about that the home was positioned in a rural space in Virginia. 

One commenter shared that the realm was ‘boring and automotive centric,’ including that ‘you are gonna want good firm (which does not appear like this household) or a option to escape and discover good firm(which appears to be like laborious to do with their automotive guidelines and curfews).’

OP answered this remark, declaring: ‘Based on all these particulars, it looks as if the perfect resolution for me can be to not match with them. I actually respect you letting me know, because it has helped solidify my remaining resolution to not pursue a match with this household. Thank you a lot.’