‘Eton Dave cannot breathe life into this rotting corpse of a Tory authorities’

THERE’S a uncommon magnificence in watching one thing you detest disintegrate earlier than your eyes.

A magnificence that shone this week because the parliamentary Tory occasion ate what was left of its twitching, mutilated corpse.

We had that narcissistic bleat from the direst of dog-whistlers, Suella Braverman, miffed at not being allowed to hold on her Enoch Powell tribute act as Home Secretary.

That cheesy-grinned zombie, Liz Truss, emerged from her tomb to unveil a rival price range to the Chancellor’s (as if her final one wasn’t disastrous sufficient) which advocated tearing up staff’ rights, reducing the minimal wage and ending paid holidays.

We had been handled to the banality of the deputy chair of the self-styled Party of Law and Order, 30p Lee, eager to ignore the courts over the Rwanda farce and “put the planes in the air” ’cos that’s what his buddies down the native need. And an illiterate letter from former Education Secretary Andrea Jenkyns, demanding a vote of no confidence within the PM which a nine-year-old Iraqi refugee would have made a greater fist of after per week on an introductory English course.

There was that financial institution supervisor in Norman Wisdom’s garments, Risible Sunak, grabbing a falling inflation quantity (which continues to be twice as excessive because the Bank of England’s goal) like a drowning man grabs driftwood.

Even extra pitiful was him attempting to spin as profitable his doomed Rwanda plan, which has wasted £140million and 18 months’ work simply to maintain the bigots completely happy. Then attempting to placate the identical bigots by making a Minister for GB News out of the lamentable Esther McVile.

But from a pile of steaming Tory dung there’ll at all times be a sure kind of man who rises and not using a skidmark: Eton Man. If it wasn’t galling sufficient watching disgraced Boris Johnson fail upwards into multi-million pound media offers, as he waits within the wings to be recalled to the centre of energy, we now witness the rebirth of his fellow Bullingdon Boy, David Cameron.

A rebirth that sees the disgraced ex-PM made a Lord and Foreign ­Secretary which has no logic or advantage, tells tons of of sitting Tory MPs they’re too insufficient to carry excessive workplace, and insults each British voter by assuming they’ve the reminiscence of a comatose goldfish. Goldfish who’ve forgotten the expensive errors of this smarmy, self-serving PR guru, to whom being Prime Minister was merely the crowning glory in a recreation he felt he was programmed to win since his silver-spooned delivery.

The architect of an austerity that led to an explosion in foodbanks, introduced the NHS and state training to its knees, and noticed the hole between wealthy and poor change into a chasm.

The slippery reptile Miriam Margolyes famously mentioned needs to be “boiled in oil” whose cack-handed try to cease Tory infighting dragged us out of the EU, earlier than he scarpered to “put his trotters up” as Danny Dyer put it, fomenting civil conflict in a rustic left culturally and economically poorer.

But Eton Dave acquired richer, exploiting his City connections and ex-PM standing to trouser £7million from a dodgy finance agency that went bust costing taxpayers £320million.

You can’t assist however admire the unflinching vanity of those entitled leeches who so simply shed their shamed pores and skin and emerge fresh-faced to reclaim their birthright.

Thankfully although, there are occasions when the frequent individuals are left nauseous by that conceited entitlement. Times like now. Come the election the goldfish received’t neglect.