Monster who strangled his girlfriend as she cradled her child is jailed

A monster who strangled his girlfriend as she cradled their child and banned her from breastfeeding has been jailed.  

Serial abuser Jonathan Cole, 42, made his pregnant girlfriend Alexis Flavlin’s life hell by ripping up their scan image, forcing her to provide delivery alone and never permitting her to hitch child teams.

When he tried to strangle her as she lay in mattress with their child daughter, Alexis, 39, realised her life was at risk and she or he went to the police.

Now the mother-of-four has spoken for the primary time of her horrific ordeal in a bid to warn different ladies.

Alexis, from Penarth, South Wales, stated: ‘I had my child on my chest as he was strangling me, and I knew I needed to maintain her protected. It was terrifying.

‘I felt so susceptible, as a brand new mum, going by means of the court docket case and seeing my child’s dad jailed. But it was the correct factor to do. I do know now he bullied me to the purpose the place I had no confidence and I accepted every part he did to me.

‘I’m price greater than that and he’s the place he belongs – behind bars.’ 

She added: ‘It’s so vital, if you welcome a brand new associate into your loved ones, to do the required checks. If I’d identified about Clare’s Law, I might have discovered about his previous.’

Alexis met Cole in 2019 by means of relations. She was unaware he had beforehand served time for assaulting one other lady.

She stated: ‘We have been simply buddies, on and off, however in 2020 we determined to begin relationship formally. He was actually pretty, serving to out with my youngsters and doing stuff round the home.

‘He was so considerate, he’d go away me little love notes round the home and make me a espresso every morning. I took the youngsters away for a number of days and he adorned their bedrooms while have been gone.’

But as time went on Cole grew to become aggressive and controlling. Alexis stated: ‘He did not like me having male buddies, regardless that it was purely platonic. He slowly remoted me from all my household – I could not even converse to my teenage daughter with out him complaining.’

In 2021, Cole proposed, and two weeks on Alexis discovered she was pregnant.

She stated: ‘I had doubts about him however once I fell pregnant, I used to be decided to provide it my greatest shot, for the sake of the child. We went to the scan collectively and he was crying with happiness.

‘But afterwards, he flew right into a rage, shouting that he did not need a child and he ripped up the scan picture. My whole being pregnant was ruined, he’d blow cold and warm, one minute he was loving, the subsequent he’d grow to be hostile.

‘My being pregnant was excessive threat, as a result of I’d had earlier miscarriages, and I simply wished him to help me and be a dad to our child.’

Cole refused to help Alexis throughout her labour in January 2023 and she or he gave delivery alone. 

She stated: ‘Eventually, the midwife rang a few my buddies, and so they got here to the hospital. But I went by means of most of my labour alone.’

After the delivery of their daughter, Alexis ended the connection however inspired Cole to see his little one. 

She stated: ‘I’d lastly accepted there was no means forwards for us, however I nonetheless wished my little lady to have a daddy. I agreed he may come to the home to see her. 

‘He was nonetheless very controlling; he did not let me breastfeed as a result of he was jealous. It was loopy however on the time, he had obtained into my head and I simply went together with every part. I wasn’t allowed to attend any child teams in case I met a person there.’

In June final yr, Alexis agreed he may sleep on the couch and she or he went upstairs with their daughter. But at 5.30am, when Cole was woken by the child monitor, he flew right into a rage.

Alexis stated: ‘I had the child on my chest, and he lunged at me, his arms spherical my throat. I could not scream, I could not breathe. I believed he was going to kill me. I used to be scared of shifting as a result of I knew I needed to maintain my child protected.

‘She was wanting up at me, and I knew I needed to get out of it alive, for her sake.’

When Cole launched her throat, Alexis pretended to name the police and he panicked and ran from the home.

She stated: ‘He was arrested quickly after, and I used to be handled by paramedics. My neck swelled and I could not swallow correctly. My ears have been ringing, and I used to be very dizzy. I needed to put on a hoodie to cover my accidents from the youngsters.’

Last month Cole was sentenced at Cardiff Crown Court for intentional strangulation.

The court docket was advised Cole had 14 earlier convictions for 16 offences. This was his third time in entrance of the courts for violence in opposition to a associate.

Kevin Seal, on behalf of Cole, stated the defendant accepts accountability for his half within the incident, in addition to the breakdown of the connection. He added how the defendant had sought assist for his actions since he had been in custody. He additionally described the strangulation incident as ‘short-lived’ and requested Judge Jeremy Jenkins to contemplate giving Cole a suspended sentence.

However, Judge Jenkins rejected this and stated it was ‘too severe’ an offence for a suspended sentence. He referred to footage of Alexis’ neck following the assault and known as her accidents ‘very nasty’. 

Addressing Cole, who appeared through video hyperlink from custody, Judge Jenkins described his assault because the ‘final act of cowardice’. He sentenced Cole to 19 months imprisonment and issued a restraining order stopping him from contacting Alexis for the subsequent 5 years.

Alexis stated: ‘I’m not silly or naive, however part of me was very susceptible throughout the relationship. I felt remoted and alone and I believed he beloved me. It’s the love bombing, the gaslighting, the manipulation, the cold and hot.

‘I stored pondering he would change for the sake of our child however now I do know he won’t ever change in any respect. I’d urge all ladies to make use of Clare’s Law to verify on a brand new associate.’

Alexis has obtained help from SUTDA – Stand Up To Domestic Violence.