Nicola felt suicidal – till she donated her kidney to a stranger

A mother-of-two who donated her kidney to a stranger has revealed how the extraordinary act of altruism saved her from severe depression – and gave her a new best friend.

Two years ago, businesswoman Nicola Hinds was suicidal after being badly treated by her previous employers while pregnant with her second child.

But when she saw a plea from single mum Ann Gath on Facebook – who had a rare illness which left her desperately needing a kidney transplant – it was a chance to give her life renewed purpose.

Nicola, 38, volunteered to help and, against all odds, discovered not only that she was a perfect match for Ann, 43, but that the pair lived just 15 miles apart in South Yorkshire.

The successful transplant took place in December 2022 and the pair have since become close friends after the op transformed both of their lives.

Nicola, who lives in Doncaster with husband Gary, 47, and children Mason, 15, and three-year-old Tommy, says: ‘Being forced out of my job, I felt worthless. I didn’t know who I was, what I was for. 

Nicola Hinds (left) saw a plea from single mum Ann Gath (right) on Facebook – who had a rare illness which left her desperately needing a kidney transplant

Nicola lives in Doncaster with husband Gary, 47, and children Mason, 15, and three-year-old Tommy

‘Seeing Ann’s appeal – a single mum desperate to live – it gave me the chance to have a purpose. At the time I had thoughts of suicide, but this gave me a reason to live.

‘It gave me perspective, a way to help myself see the world could be a better place. I needed to help her as much as she needed my help.’

Barnsley-based Ann, who has five children, was diagnosed in 2017 with rare genetic issue autosomal dominant tubulointerstitial kidney disease (ADTKD).

Just one in 65,000 Britons suffer from the condition, which affects one or both kidneys and causes them to deteriorate.

It is fatal without a transplant, and Ann was relying on a dialysis machine – which filters excess water and toxins out of the blood in place of the failing kidneys – three times a week to survive. 

The average waiting time for a kidney is two to three years, yet her expected replacement was longer due to her blood type, O-negative, which – unlike others – is only compatible with another O-negative donor.

Feeling ‘hopeless and desperate’ she posted her story on Facebook in a bid to find a match.

Thankfully, more than 60 people contacted transplant coordinators at Sheffield’s Northern General hospital where Ann was being treated – one being Nicola.

At the time, she was taking her employer to a tribunal for constructive dismissal and pregnancy discrimination. The process left her with severe mental health problems.

‘I wasn’t getting dressed, not eating properly or seeing anyone. But [Ann’s Facebook post] seemed like fate, something bringing us together, two people in desperate need when almost nobody else could help,’ says Nicola. ‘It was complete serendipity, I knew I had the same blood type.’

Most kidney donations – some 1,200 a year – come from deceased donors. Living donors, who can offer a kidney or part of their liver, are usually close family.

About 80 living donors every year are altruistic – someone alive, donating to a stranger – but these organs are offered to the best match on the national waiting list, not to a named individual.

Just six donors last year gave an organ to a specific stranger, just like Nicola. Its official term is directed altruistic donation.

These tend to arise from pleas on social media but, while the first cases emerged in 2015, there are still only a handful every year, says the Human Tissue Authority, the regulator which approves cases.

Nicola, 38, volunteered to help and, against all odds, discovered not only that she was a perfect match for Ann, 43, but that the pair lived just 15 miles apart in South Yorkshire

There were 15 approved in 2021, and 16 in 2022. When Nicola came back as a perfect match, it seemed ‘too good to be true’, Ann says.

They met for the first time two weeks before the transplant and became extremely close. Their families met and their children ‘got on brilliantly’.

‘I never thought I’d make a friend out of this, but from the first moment we met it was like we’d always been friends,’ Nicola says.

Following the surgery, Ann is now training to become a nurse.

But Nicola also has her life back. She has set up Pregnant Pickle (pregnant-pickle.co.uk) to support working mothers with employment-related issues.

It was only after Nicola won her tribunal that she told Ann what she had been going through. But she says she ‘never felt like a hero’.

‘Ann came into my life to save me, and I came into her life to save her,’ she adds. ‘I have a best friend I never knew I had, and our kids have friends for life, too.’

Nicola and Ann are supporting the Make Your Mark campaign from Kidney Research UK and Give A Kidney (donateakidney.co.uk). For support call the Samaritans on 116 123 or visit samaritans.org.