‘My boyfriend began new enterprise so stopped paying me consideration – it is arduous’

A frustrated woman has sought advice on how to handle her boyfriend’s seven-day working week.

The troubled lady took to Mumsnet, where she shared with the forum her partner of two years’ entire time was consumed by his new business venture.

She asked: “Would you stay with a boyfriend that worked seven days a week?” Then elaborated that “he promises he’ll take one day off per week when the business opens”.

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The woman went on: “When we met he had an established business… but still worked seven days a week, taking time off for special occasions, my birthday and Christmas. Thought about popping the question as I do love him very much, he’s otherwise a top-notch partner (when he’s around) and I would feel better knowing he was grafting for our future.”

The woman further added she’d been reassured his workaholic tendencies were for their mutual benefit, and she had “no reason to disbelieve” him. However, she noted: “I suppose it would be nice to have that commitment/something solid. It’s a hefty load to bear when you’re ‘just’ a girlfriend.”

After questioning if others thought she was being unreasonable, scores of other women chimed in, telling her they wouldn’t tolerate such behaviour. “No way would this be the life for me,” one person declared. “Do you want kids? If so, would you be content to raise them practically solo? You say he’s working on your future but when is the finish line? When he retires?”

Another woman chimed in, stating it wasn’t beneficial for the boyfriend or their relationship for him to be working such long hours. “There needs to be some sort of limit,” she voiced. “I don’t think someone working seven days a week is conducive to a healthy relationship in my opinion. He needs to draw a line, and balance building a business with spending time with you.”

She went on: “I wouldn’t even consider marriage under the current circumstances, and I think it’s somewhat foolish to consider that marrying would cement that commitment. The relationship parameters need to be right now.”

And a third woman begged: “Please don’t marry a man to try and change him or how he leads his life. Please don’t have kids with a man to try and change him or how he leads his life. Please marry a man and have kids with a man you are already happy with how he leads his life, that he shows you who he is, and you love that man.”

The original poster later returned to the thread explaining that having read all the responses, she was going to address the matter directly. However, some sympathised with the man, with one woman adding: “Personally I wouldn’t mind doing the majority myself but I appreciate it would be pretty tough. With all due respect unless you’ve been there you don’t know how you’d feel.”

And second woman commented: “It’s ridiculously hard when you set up a new business. Most businesses fail within the first two years so he is still in the ‘bunker down and get it established’ phase.”

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