‘Trent in England’s midfield will likely be a catastrophe – he is a legal responsibility off the ball’
Why does everyone think Trent Alexander-Arnold in midfield is a good idea?
He might be able to whip a few fancy-looking balls about against Bosnia and HertzRentACar, but put him up against half-decent opposition and he’d be a total liability, like Boris Johnson in 2019.
His technical brilliance and impressive passing range might make the unwashed masses on social media swoon, but most of them have the attention span and tactical understanding of a gnat.
READ MORE: Gareth Southgate reckons Trent Alexander-Arnold can solve big England issue at Euro 2024
I mean for crying out loud, the bloke can’t defend! He guards the right flank like he’s just smoked a joint in his mate’s mum’s basement. Imagine how cr*p he’d be when he’s got 360 degrees to monitor.
Gareff is obviously keen to give it a go at the Euros, but when Pedri and Rodri are running rings around his Frankenstein’s monster of a midfield in the quarters, I’ll be waiting here with my smuggest ‘I told you so’ face.
Can England win the Euros with Trent Alexander-Arnold in midfield? Let us know what you think in the comments section below.
(Image: Getty Images)
Ballon d’O me a favour
I hate the fact the Champions League final dictates who wins the Ballon d’Or these days.
Sure, winning trophies is important, but letting 90 minutes of football impact who the player of the year award goes to is about as dumb as sacking Mauricio Pochettino after a run of one defeat in 15 games.
This stupidity was summed up best by Rio ‘still talks like a teenager’ Ferdinand, who was, unfortunately for everyone with a working set of ears, on punditry duty for Real Madrid vs Dortmund.
After Vinicius Jr’s second half strike, an eye-rollingly giddy Ferdinand yapped: “Ballon d’Or! Ballon d’Or! That’s the Ballon d’Or,” before adding for much-needed clarity: “That’s the Ballon d’Or in the bag”. Minutes earlier, after Jude Bellingham missed a sitter, he droned: “Jude, man! That was the Ballon d’Or in his hands”.
This sort of moronic, reactive, nonsense is one of the worst things about modern football, up there with Arsenal Fan TV and the phrase ‘absolute limbs’. The Ballon d’Or should be given to the world’s best-performing player, not to the fella who scored a cup final toe poke for the best-performing team.
Stop being a ball-ache
I can’t stand this new trend of attaching the word ‘ball’ to the end of football managers’ names.
We’ve had ‘Klopp-ball’, ‘Ange-ball’, ‘Sarri-ball’ and even ‘Mourinho-ball’, which sounds more like a torture device than a footballing philosophy.
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You can’t just pick any bloody coach. If they don’t set their team up in a unique and vaguely interesting manner then consider them ball-gagged! I mean for God’s sake I’ve seen ‘Dyche-ball’ knocking about online, though that might be referring to the sacks of gravel big Sean eats for breakfast.
We’ve got to say no to all this Americanised b*llocks, like Chelsea fans probably wished they’d have done a couple years back.
