Top your glasses up for MailOnline’s election night time ingesting sport
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The General Election is finally here! After five torturous weeks of scandals, absurd pledges, painfully staged photo-ops and Ed Davey belly flops, the campaigns are officially over.
By this time tomorrow, the fate of the country will be decided for the next five years and to mark this momentous occasion many Brits will spend their evenings glued to their TV sets with drinks in hand.
Drinking through the night whilst you watch the count come in places like Swindon South and Blyth Valley is a time honoured British tradition, occupying the same sacred pantheon as queuing or feeding ducks when you’ve been told not to.
Coverage is set to kick off on the BBC from 10pm where the country will have its first glimpse into the future with the dreaded exit poll. This will set the flavour of the night: heroes forged, villains crowned.
Once that’s out of the way, the serious stories (and drinking) will begin to play out. What’s better than watching a politician you’ve always despised crying as they lose their seat? Doing so with a Stella in hand of course!
Cheers! The General Election is FINALLY here! To celebrate the MailOnline has concocted a devilish drinking game
Will Keir be on the beers? The Labour leader is expected to win a huge majority when voting is done
However it could be a sobering night for Tory Prime Minister Rishi Sunak who is projected to lose countless seats
Following his dare devil campaign exploits, does Sir Ed Davey have one more trick up his sleeve
Find Jeremy Vine‘s ‘swingometer’ twee and embarrassing? Try watching it after you’ve necked a snakebite and you’ll think its a new ITV game show.
As the night rolls on into the wee hours, the political landscape of the UK will be decimated by shuddering electoral quakes, shakes and surprises. You can replicate this at home by downing two bottles of wine and spinning around on your office chair.
To celebrate the count, MailOnline has devised a devilish drinking game that will ensure by the time 7am rolls around tomorrow you’ll neither know or care who’s currently in power.
All you need to take part is a fridge load of booze and little to no self respect, enjoy!
MailOnline’s General Election Drinking Game
1 drink
Drink when the first constituency declares.
Political aides are seen scheming.
Drink every time Sir John Curtice appears on screen.
One drink for every Big Ben BONG during the 10pm exit poll.
An SNP MP mentions independence in their victory speech.
A candidate from a smaller party whines that we don’t use the PR voting system.
A politician or correspondent says ‘It’s still early’ or ‘There’s a long way to go yet.’
Dominic Cummings starts rage tweeting after the exit poll.
Every time the word ‘supermajority’ is uttered.
The game kicks off with one drink for every Big Ben BONG during the 10pm exit poll
Drink every time BBC election legend Sir John Curtice appears on screen
Jeremy Hunt (left) will be hoping to retain his seat and avoid a Michael Portillo (right) moment. The then senior Tory MP sensationally lost his seat at the count in 1997 in a shock result.
2 drinks
A former leader of any party loses their seat.
Jeremy Hunt has a ‘Portillo’ moment.
A member of the cabinet loses their seat.
A member of Labour’s shadow cabinet loses their seat.
The BBC cuts to the wrong constituency count.
Ed Davey is seen guffawing.
Jeremy Vine gets excited by his ‘swingometer’.
An ousted MP refuses to give an interview.
Laura Kuenssberg squints.
An MP loses their seat and starts crying.
Clive Myrie looks tired and grumpy.
Keir Starmer looks smug.
Rishi Sunak looks sad.
Ed Davey looks drunk.
Jacob Rees Mogg checks his pocket watch.
Jeremy Vine says ‘WOW’ or ‘That’s extraordinary!’
The swingometer will be in the hands of your friend, and mine, Jeremy Vine
Happy go lucky Ed Davey guffaws with the intensity of a hundred men
Jacob Rees-Mogg will be present at the count in his traditional Victorian best
It will be a long night of forensic questioning from Laura Kuenssberg
Will PM Rishi Sunak come up against Count Binface in Richmond and North Alllerton?
Will Jeremy Corbyn be elected as an Independent MP? (Pictured: The former Labour leader throttling a marrow)
3 drinks
Liz Truss loses her seat.
Nigel Farage fails to become an MP for the sixth time.
Rishi Sunak is pictured next to Count Binface.
Jeremy Corbyn is elected as an independent MP.
Boris Johnson unaccountably turns up somewhere.
Down your drink
Rishi Sunak loses his seat.
Ed Davey fires himself out of a cannon.
The Liberal Democrats overtake the Conservatives.
