Doctor did not search assist for one, easy-to-dismiss symptom…it was most cancers that killed him in 3 weeks

A woman whose ‘fit and healthy’ husband died just three weeks after a devastating cancer diagnosis has urged others never to ignore unusual symptoms. 

Thelma Ainsworth, 50, said her husband Jonathan — a 59 year-old doctor and father of their two children — waited several months before seeking medical advice for his bout of stomach pain.

By that point, it was too late. Doctors discovered bile duct cancer that had ‘spread everywhere’.

‘It was more advanced than we could possibly imagine,’ said Ms Ainsworth, a London-based lawyer. 

‘Even though Jonathan was a doctor, he didn’t get checked immediately, he waited until it was too late.

‘Once you know that there’s something wrong, get yourself checked out as soon as possible.’

The earliest signs that something was wrong began in 2019, when Mr Ainsworth — a keen runner who was ‘always training’ — started complaining of a pain in his stomach. 

He did little about it for several months, until he noticed he had begun to lose weight.

Jonathan Ainsworth, 59, was ‘fit and healthy’ and ‘always running and training’ before he was diagnosed with deadly bile duct cancer.

When he eventually spoke to a doctor, he was referred for a scan which revealed severe inflammation in the liver.

While waiting for the referral, the infectious disease specialist decided to take his own bloods, with the results showing something ‘wasn’t right’. 

‘He went off to St Mary’s Hospital and they said that he had cancer,’ said Ms Ainsworth.

In October 2019, doctors revealed he had bile duct cancer, which affects around 3,000 people in the UK every year. 

The disease impacts the tubes in the digestive system that carry bile; a fluid that helps the body digest food. 

Between 20 and 25 per cent of those diagnosed at the earliest stages will survive for more than five years, compared to between two and five per cent of those who are diagnosed later, when the cancer has spread. 

Due to the position of the bile ducts within the body, it easily migrates to other nearby organs, like the pancreas and the bowel.

Bile duct cancer can be symptomless, particularly in its earliest stages. 

But when it does cause problems, signs include changes to your bowel habits, itchy skin, high temperature, abdominal pain and weight loss.

Despite being a doctor, he left it ‘too late’ to seek medical help for his stomach pain. 

His widow, Thelma Ainsworth, spent years struck with guilt about not pushing her husband to see a doctor sooner.

 Some also notice yellowing of the skin and the white of the eyes — known medically as jaundice. 

Within three weeks of Mr Ainsworth’s diagnosis he had ‘gone’, leaving her widowed with two young children. 

Soon afterwards, she found that she started blaming herself, believing it was her fault for her husband’s untimely death.

‘Since the diagnosis and for many months, maybe years afterwards, I blamed myself,’ she said.

‘[I thought] that it was somehow my fault…because I didn’t get him to check himself out.’

In 2022, it ‘all came to a head’ while she was trying to write a children’s book — something she had wanted to do for years.

She discovered that her grief acted as a ‘blockage’ to her creative writing and decided to start journaling to help her process the difficult emotions.

These notes became the inspiration for her first memoir, I Am A Wolf Tonight.

 ‘It was this blockage inside me that I felt I needed to release,’ she said.

The book, which she described as ‘raw, unflinching and honest’, explores themes of cancer loss, complex grief, love, resilience and perseverance.

There is ‘no right or wrong way to do grief’, according to Ms Ainsworth.

But she hopes her words will offer hope and encourage others to be patient and kind to themselves.

‘At some point you will reach a stage where you’re able to process that grief, but it will take years, and I’m not unusual in that.

‘ I hope that my book is helpful for anyone who’s been in that circumstance where they’ve had to go out of their way to reveal their inner animal in order to survive.’