I’m getting married and I’m horrified by my future mother-in-law’s weird request
A woman has shared her horror at her future mother-in-law’s plans to hijack her wedding dinner.
The bride-to-be vented her frustrations on US social forum, Reddit, where she revealed that her fiancé’s mom was attempting to remodel the prenuptial meal into a ‘groom’s dinner’ so she could ‘honor’ her son.
Traditionally, a groom’s dinner is a pre-wedding feast held the night before the ceremony as a way to celebrate close friends and family, and which is typically paid for by the groom’s family.
The title is interchangeable with ‘rehearsal dinner’ as it is generally held to acknowledge both the bride and groom.
However the woman lamented that her future in-law refused to accept this, and had even insisted on placing portraits of her son around the party table.
She said her partner ‘gently’ informed his mom that the event was a dual celebration and that the pictures weren’t ‘necessary’ but his pleading fell on deaf ears.
It appeared the poster was now at her wits end and so turned to Reddit for advice.
Most users shared her anger, while one person suggested the mother-in-law have her own pre-wedding dinner.
‘My future mother-in-law insists that our rehearsal dinner, which she calls the groom’s dinner, is meant to celebrate the groom’ she bemoaned.
A woman has shared her horror at her future mother-in-law’s plans to hijack her wedding dinner (Stock image)
‘My fiancé has already explained to her that it is about spending time with our closest family and friends, expressing our gratitude, and practicing for the ceremony.
‘Despite this, she brought it up again today and asked if she should set up pictures of my fiancé at the dinner’.
She went on to say that when she ‘gently reminded’ her future in-law that the ‘pictures were not necessary’ she became ‘visibly frustrated’.
‘[She] insisted that some people do, in fact, have a groom’s dinner specifically to honor the groom’ continued the poster.
‘I was caught off guard and honestly do not know whether to address it further or just let it go.
‘I do not want this to become a bigger issue, but I also do not want to keep having the same conversation’.
The events had left her dumbfounded and she concluded the message by asking users how best to remedy the situation.
Replying to the post, one person said her mother-in-law was ’embarrassing herself’.
The bride-to-be vented her frustrations on US social forum, Reddit , where she revealed that her fiancé’s mom was attempting to remodel the prenuptial meal into a ‘groom’s dinner’ so she could ‘honor’ her son (Stock image)
They wrote: ‘You don’t have to do anything. Your fiancé is on your side, let him handle his own mother. If you want to find middle ground, it wouldn’t be inappropriate for her to give a groom-oriented toast at the rehearsal dinner. If she doesn’t acknowledge you at all, she’s just embarrassing herself’.
‘I mean, she is welcome to host her own grooms dinner if she is so inclined’, stated another.
‘I would have your fiancé deal with this’ they continued. ‘[Tell her] “Mom, this rehearsal dinner is about both of us. I don’t want a groom’s dinner, I don’t want photos of just me, and I won’t discuss it again”’.
Most users shared the woman’s anger, while one person suggested the mother-in-law have her own pre-wedding dinner
Meanwhile, someone else said her man should ‘set her straight’: ‘Oh wow. If my FMIL (future mother-in-law) did that, I would tell my fiance that his #1 job is to set her straight immediately and leave no room for confusion.
‘Then he needs to do whatever necessary to enforce that. I would stay out of it if I were you unless it’s unavoidable. Her son can confront this behavior in a more acceptable and non-negotiable way than you can at this point. Sorry, that sounds like a really annoying situation’.
A number of users said they’d never heard of the ‘groom’s dinner’ custom, while one person stated it was a ‘super old school name for a rehearsal dinner’.
It’s not the first time a groom’s mother has caused havoc – and it definitely won’t be the last.
In 2019, a mother-in-law committed what some people branded a ‘murderous offence’ at her son’s wedding.
The woman, who has been kept anonymous online, shocked her wedding party in a floor length lace frock that looked almost identical to the bride’s dress.
A ‘distant member of the family’ shared an image of the bride and mother-in-law together to a wedding shaming group on Facebook, saying they even had the same sleeves.
Very quickly it became apparent that others would have despised this turn of events at their own nuptials with some suggesting it was ‘a murderous offence’.
‘I wouldn’t have any pictures with her or any taken of her. That’s so disrespectful to the bride and groom,’ one person said.
‘Also yes, it’s ice blue, but it’s still horribly wrong for a mother-in-law to wear at the wedding. It still looks like a bridal gown. My MIL (mother-in-law) wore ice blue too but it was clearly not a bridal gown,’ another said.
