‘My sexy ex is again and is hungry for intercourse however it’s all occurring too quick’

JUST JANE: Today our agony aunt Jane O’Gorman is dealing with a new issue from a Daily Star reader who is both flattered and scared by a demanding ex-lover

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If you have a problem that needs solving and you don’t know where to turn, look no further.

Every day, the Daily Star’s very own agony aunt Jane O’Gorman is on hand to tackle your issues and concerns with some straight-talking but sound advice.

From bedroom confessions to self-confidence issues , drug use and everything else, Jane has helped thousands of Daily Star readers over the years and isn’t slowing down.

If you want help, you can write to Just Jane, Daily Star, One Canada Square, London, E145AP or email [email protected]. Please note that Jane cannot respond to individual letters and not all problems will be published.

Her potty mouth scares me

My ex-girlfriend has started messaging me. She expects us to pick up where we left off.

She’s coming down soon and assumes we’ll have sex again straight away. The other night she started talking dirty and I explained that I need time.

I am lonely and would love a proper relationship again. She broke my heart the last time she walked away, and I haven’t met anyone as attractive since. If I’m honest, I’m embarrassed about my body and having sex. I’m out of practise. What if I’m not good enough?

What if she expects certain sexual acts and erotic games that I don’t know and haven’t mastered?

JANE SAYS: I get the impression that you’re still dazzled and impressed by your ex-girlfriend, but nothing gives her the right to put you on the spot.

I suggest you get back to her and assert yourself. Make it clear that you may have history together, but that doesn’t entitle her to any sexual fast track. Tell her that you insist on taking things slowly, so that you can get to know each other all over again. Discuss romantic dates, long walks and a huge amount of conversation.

Make sure that you set the pace regarding sex and only become intimate when you feel perfectly relaxed and ready. You will know the time is right. I’m slightly concerned about picking up with an ex. Why did you break up in the first place? Just be certain she’s not using you.

It’s a rat trap

My mate is dating a scumbag. He’s a drug user and a leech. She has a good job but has a blind spot as far as he is concerned. She gives him money and makes excuses for him.

She can’t trust anything he says. He swears that he’s cleaning up his act, but then he goes on a bender and she’s terrified that he’s in the arms of another woman. We can all see him for what he is, so why can’t she?

JANE SAYS: If your mate loves this slug and wants to keep giving him cash and ‘final’ chances, then that’s her business. Maybe you need to accept that this is her life and her relationship?

If you, and others who love her, have warned her that you’re concerned about her position, and she continues to ignore you, then what more can you do? I worry that you’re now so concerned about her life that you’re neglecting your own.

Talk to her one, last time; beg her to visit her GP about her own health and well-being. Also suggest she checks out FRANK talktofrank.com (0300 123 6600) for help and information.

Left high and dry

I was convinced my guy was going to propose on New Year’s Day. It never happened. We had sex, he got drunk and then gave me a long lecture about how he’ll never marry.

I have tried to explain to him how humiliated and let down I now feel. But he’s switched off. What’s my next move?

JANE SAYS: This is a new beginning for you. You can do or be anything you want to. Do you stay with a man who has no interest in making your relationship legal, or do you move on?

Remember that he is not the only guy in the world. If he’s not right for you, then there are plenty of others who will well be. Take control.