Five causes Doomsday Clock will transfer even nearer to midnight – Bonnie Blue to Donald Trump

Let’s be honest, we’re all screwed to some extent, and with the declaration of the Doomsday Clock’s new position just hours away, it’s time to see what could screw us over next

Later today, the world is probably going to move closer to annihilation than ever before. With the announcement of the new state of the Doomsday Clock coming at 3pm, it is more than likely that the boffins behind it will bring the clock closer to midnight from its already-worrying 89 seconds position.

And with Donald Trump seemingly intent on causing more chaos, while Vladimir Putin stirs the pot, and our own Prime Minister Keir Starmer does . . . well . . . not very much to make anything better, could we really see the world declared to be in a more perilous state than ever? It currently stands at 89 seconds, with climate change, war in Europe, Donald Trump and artificial intelligence ruled as the main reasons why it was moved to a historically dangerous level on the clock last year.

Well, yes – probably – but there are many reasons outside of the obvious ones as to why that could be, and we at the Daily Star have put together a lovely, sobering little guide to the top five reasons why the world is on the brink . . . and only one of them is Donald Trump (we’ll save him for last).

Bonnie Blue

The world’s most infamous “pick me” adult star made a declaration to start 2026 – she wants to get pregnant and she wants as many men as possible to make it happen. Initially scheduled for Saturday, January 17, the divisive adult performer pushed back the date to Saturday, February 7, claiming it needed to sync with her biological cycle.

Speaking candidly, Bonnie revealed what she describes as a deliberate strategy in an Instagram post. “Boys, I am so sorry I delayed my last event,” she said. “But that’s because I want to give you the opportunity to become a daddy.

“So Saturday, February 7, is not only the perfect time, but the perfect opportunity for you to become a dad.”

She wrapped up her twisted agenda by declaring: “I don’t want to stop before you breed me.”

By our reckoning, if it happens in February, then by the end of this year there could be many Bonnie Blue sprogs on Earth – and that, quite frankly, is a pre-emptive reason to declare doomsday if ever there was one.

Arsenal

It was once said that Arsenal would probably never win the league, and the world would end if it were to happen. Well, for the majority of the back end of 2025, and January this year, Mikel Arteta’s men have been top of the Premier League.

And barring some dramatic collapse, they are still favourites with the bookies to bag the title . . . which could spark the end of the world (not just for Tottenham Hotspur fans).

Earth, however, could still be saved by Manchester City or even Aston Villa, with the latter seemingly reading like something out of a Marvel script.

What a wild world we could be living in if the hopes of mankind rested on the shoulders of a team formally led by Gabby Agbonlahor. Yikes

Mr Blobby

The nightmare of 90s British TV announced a comeback at the end of 2025, with sources claiming the BBC was looking to aim it at younger generations.

It was then confirmed that Unique Television had put in the paperwork online to make sure the Mr Blobby trademark was protected ahead of his “triumphant return”.

It is thought that his return will take place via promo appearances around the country and several TV spots on already popular shows like Good Morning Britain.

But in the view of the Daily Star, the first promo we see should be seen as the start of the end times . . . because the thought of that big pink spotty creepy thing returning is definitely a reason for doomsday.

Artificial Intelligence

Ok, this one is quite serious. We’re all aware that AI could replace us in the next few years (please don’t, I need the money), but it could also be the very reason we’re all destroyed.

With the threat of World War 3 growing by the hour, and humanity’s increased reliance on AI, the rather horrifying tech could lead to our downfall far faster.

The Daily Star even asked AI about itself and it confirmed that it could very well be one of the key reasons why the Doomsday Clock gets closer to midnight than ever before.

Google’s Gemini told us: “AI is a ‘threat multiplier’ and a revolutionary tool. It accelerates scientific breakthroughs and efficiency but simultaneously erodes truth through disinformation, automates warfare, and lowers barriers for biological attacks.

“By shrinking human decision time during crises, it makes the global system more capable yet significantly more fragile and volatile.”

Great . . .

Donald Trump

Look, this feels very obvious, but the man is seemingly intent on taking over random countries while fanning the flames of war elsewhere. He claims to have stopped many wars, but in reality he hasn’t – and in some cases has just made them worse (Russia’s ongoing onslaught in Ukraine being the prime example).

If any one specific person could be the root cause of chaos, it can, and will, only be the President of the United States – which is a made sentence to write, but given we’re living in the worst possible timeline . . . it’s not a shock.

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