Dads say fatherhood is constructed on on a regular basis moments – from first smiles to bittersweet ‘lasts’
There’s no single moment that makes you a dad, according to a poll of 1,500 fathers – with the majority saying it’s the hundreds of small, everyday memories
Dads have revealed the key moments in their fatherhood journey – from carrying their baby out of hospital to watching them grow up and even have a child of their own.
A poll of 1,500 dads found 89% agreed fatherhood is built on lots of small moments rather than major milestones. And a fifth (21%) said the moment they held their child in their arms was when they officially became a ‘dad’.
But for others, it took a first smile to make it feel real, with 28% saying it was the first time their child properly smiled at them that did it, making them feel like ‘the only person in the world’. Many said it’s a memory that’s stayed with them ever since.
The study was commissioned by Moonpig, and sparked a collaboration with writer Daragh Fleming, who penned an original poem about his own father to celebrate Father’s Day 2026.
Daragh Fleming said: “Generally, I don’t think men are comfortable saying ‘I love you’ to each other. I know for me it’s easier to say it to my mother than my father. And I’m trying to challenge that in my own life.
“Dads may not always say ‘I love you’ out loud, but they show it in a million other ways – these everyday actions inspired my poem.
“The main messages I wanted to convey were the gratitude I feel to my dad and to assure him I never take for granted everything he’s done to help me, no matter how small it might seem.
“Lately, I’ve been telling my Dad I love him when I see him, and he says it back, and we hug, and it’s lovely, important, needed.”
It wasn’t just the firsts that stuck in dads’ minds – “lasts” ranked highly too. That included the last night their child spent at home before moving out (14%), the last time they stood at the school gates for pick-up (10%), and the last time their child wanted to hold hands (12%).
The results also reflected the moments that weren’t all sunshine and rainbows. Some dads said the toughest times were learning how to navigate other children being mean (14%), handling tantrums (22%), or even rushing to hospital when they feared something was wrong (21%).
Later in life, highlights included attending graduations, walking their daughter down the aisle, and giving speeches at their children’s weddings and milestone birthdays – including their 21st and 30th. Some also listed the first pub trip together when they turned 18.
New dads, with little ones aged up to four, said they show affection most often through playing games (30%) and helping them get ready in the morning (24%).
But as children grow up, acts of care shift towards playing sport together (18%), investing in their hobbies and passions (18%), and supporting their creativity (18%).
Once they’re officially “adults”, dads express their love by being on hand to offer lifts when needed (15%) and always picking up the phone, no matter what (20%), according to OnePoll.com data.
These sentiments were reflected in what they believe makes a “hero” in everyday family life – doing their best to be present emotionally and physically (33%), showing up consistently (34%), and prioritising quality time no matter how hectic life gets (30%).
Kristof Fahy from Moonpig, which has created two cards featuring Daragh’s work, that form part of its unique Father’s Day range this year, said: “Every dad has a special recipe of moments and qualities that contribute to who he is.
“From the first moment we meet our little bundle of joy, the life of a dad is forever changed and full of ups, downs, and in-betweens that become cherished memories later on.
“As Daragh’s beautiful poem describes it, fatherhood is a ‘masterpiece’ that we all paint in our own unique way.
“Whilst no two fatherhood stories are the same, we wanted to celebrate every kind of dad’s story this year.”
TOP 10 KEY MOMENTS DURING THE FATHERHOOD JOURNEY:
- Watching them drift off to sleep on my chest and not daring to move a muscle.
- Helping them take their first wobbly steps on their own.
- That very first real smile that made me feel like the centre of the universe.
- Guiding them as they found their feet, only to realise they no longer needed me to hold on.
- The first time I managed to soothe them with nothing more than a hug and the sound of my voice.
- Being the one they came running to whenever they got hurt.
- Staying up through the night when they were under the weather.
- Hearing them say they love me completely out of nowhere.
- A moment when they reached out to hold my hand in public.
- That very first school drop-off.
