Ultimate information to Clacton by-election – together with full listing of bonkers candidates

Britain’s wildest election battle has officially hit Clacton-on-Sea – and it promises to be pure, unadulterated madness. Voters across the Essex coastal hub are heading to 51 polling stations spread from Jaywick, Frinton and Walton-on-the-Naze to quiet rural hideaways like St Osyth, Weeley and Great Bentley.

Once inside the booth, they are being handed a staggering 90cm (3ft) voting slip, officially the longest ballot paper in British electoral history. The entire spectacle was kicked off when Reform UK leader Nigel Farage abruptly stepped down to trigger a fresh vote.

The decision came after intense scrutiny surrounding his finances, notably a £5 million donation from crypto billionaire Christopher Harborne alongside gifts linked to convicted criminal George Cottrell.

Political rivals were quick to stick the boot in. Labour’s Yvette Cooper slammed the dramatic resignation as a “political tantrum”, while other critics blasted the contest as a “stunt” designed purely as a “distraction” from his cash troubles.

Who will win?

After the mainstream parties refused to run candidates, a massive 34 hopefuls jumped into the ring, smashing the record for the most candidates ever in a single UK parliamentary election. A whopping 20 of them are running as independents.

Survation polling for Mandate Research indicates Farage is still cruising toward a comfortable victory with 73 per cent of the vote.

His closest contender is intergalactic space warrior Count Binface on 20 per cent, whose manifesto includes capping the price of croissants at a strict £1, forced national service for commuters who blast loud music on public transport and building at least one affordable home

Meanwhile, actor-turned-activist Laurence Fox is languishing on just 2 per cent for The Reclaim Party.

Polling and Results Timings

Voting Hours: Polling stations are open from 7am until doors close at 10pm.

The Count: Ballot boxes will be rushed to Clacton Leisure Centre between 10.10pm and 11.30pm.

The Result: With 79,785 registered voters (and over 10,000 postal votes already bagged), verifying and counting nearly a metre of paper is no quick task.

Officials are setting up extra-large tables, but the winner isn’t expected to be crowned until between 5am and 7am on Friday morning, so expect to digest the outcome over your morning toast.

Full List of Candidates

Joseph 77 (Independent)

Adham Alkhatip (The Forward Party)

Count Binface (Count Binface Party)

Nick The Incredible Flying Brick (The Official Monster Raving Loony Party)

Tony Cane (Independent)

Woke Trump Carrzee (Independent)

William Stuart James Clouston (Social Democratic Party)

Rees Cowne (Independent)

Glenn Charles Cummings (Independent)

Martin Davies (Freedom Alliance – Real People, Real Alternative!)

Andy Erlam (Independent)

Nigel Farage (Reform UK)

Attieh Fard (Independent)

Laurence Fox (The Reclaim Party)

Tony Francis (Independent)

Robin Green (Independent)

Abi Hookway (Independent)

Howling Laud Hope (The Official Monster Raving Loony Party)

Stephen Richard Ingram (Independent)

Amy Morris (Independent)

Derrick Norbert Morris (Independent)

Michael Noel O’Keeffe (Independent)

Martyn O’Brien (Independent)

Nick Pelas (Independent)

Ketankumar Pipaliya (UK VOICE safer and stronger UK)

Daniel Pocock (Independent)

James Ransley (Consensus Party Candidate)

Gerry Smith (Independent)

Kai Stephens (British Democrats)

John Stevens (Rejoin EU)

Baron Von Thunderclap (The Official Monster Raving Loony Party)

Pamela Walford (Independent)

Marcus White (Everyone is God Party)