RICHARD LITTLEJOHN: Why don’t we send migrants to places keen on mass migration

The number of immigrants illegally crossing the Channel has already overtaken the record 28,000 who arrived by dinghy last year.

Another 3,500 landed in the first two weeks of this month, 601 on Monday alone. According to Nigel Farage —who has been bang on the money since this exodus began — there are at least 5,000 camped out on the French coast waiting for their number to come up on the escape committee.

Once they put to sea they will be given safe passage by the people-smugglers’ complimentary water taxi services, aka Britain’s Border Force and the RNLI.

When they land in Kent, the chances of them being sent back are less than zero. The so-called ‘fast track’ removals system is currently a year behind schedule.

It has been revealed that Albanian gangsters are offering a tantalising three-for-the-price-of-two deal, so the influx is only set to increase exponentially over the next couple of months.

Meanwhile, the Blob continues to scupper all attempts to tackle this crisis and British taxpayers are being forced to cough up for no less than 40 barristers on legal aid to obstruct Priti Flamingo’s plan to send illegals to Rwanda.

When the deportation scheme was announced in the spring, civil servants threatened to go on strike to stop it happening.

Priti has now been replaced as Home Secretary by Sue Ellen Braverman, who will face fierce resistance from within her own department by entrenched officials conducting a guerrilla campaign against the Rwanda initiative.

As I wrote back in April, civil servants from the top down now feel they can with impunity say ‘No, Minister’ and simply refuse to implement any policy they don’t like.

They know they can rely on support from Leftie politicians, the taxpayer-funded yuman rites brigade and the anti-Tory broadcast media.

While we roll out the red carpet in Dover, the one-way traffic will continue unimpeded. I can’t help wondering how the authorities would react if these migrants were arriving not by sea but by air.

What would happen if instead of packing their ‘customers’ into inflatable boats, the people-smugglers started filling planes with hundreds of passengers and landing them illegally at Heathrow and Gatwick?

Once they’d touched down on British soil, would Border Force simply stand back and wave them through immigration and customs, no questions asked?

And imagine this was happening several times a day, every single day. Most likely they’d be buzzed by the RAF when they attempted to enter UK airspace. In the event of them being allowed to touch down, they’d be rounded up at gunpoint by the Army.

Or not, as the case may be, if the treatment of migrants washing up in Dover is any indication. They are immediately fed and watered and whisked off to comfortable hotels to await processing.

There is a precedent, of course. More than 20 years ago, when a group of Afghan ‘asylum seekers’ hijacked an airliner and landed at Stansted, they were put on a coach to the nearest Hilton. Although nine were charged and found guilty of hijacking, their convictions were overturned on appeal and they escaped deportation on the grounds it would be a breach of their yuman rights.

Just as I predicted then, they’re still here.

Despite the abortive efforts of a succession of ministers, Britain remains a soft touch.

The 28,000 who have arrived at Dover are only those we know about. Plenty more have landed further along the coast. Locals in Kent regularly report gangs of young foreign men wandering through the countryside heading for who-knows-where.

Most of them disappear into the black economy. Others claim asylum if caught. No wonder schools, hospitals and housing are bursting at the seams.

Kent bears the brunt of this influx. Dispersal schemes have stalled in the face of trenchant local opposition in the North of England.

Maybe it’s time to take a leaf out of Texas governor Greg Abbott’s book. Since Joe Biden laid out the welcome mat after becoming U.S. President in 2021, there have been almost five million unauthorised crossings from Mexico.

Border states such as Texas and Arizona have felt the full force of this invasion, which has been cheered on by Democrat politicians in New York, Chicago and Washington DC, at little or no cost to themselves or their voters.

Republican Abbott has now decided to turn the tables on them. He has been chartering fleets of buses to transport thousands of migrants north to the self-styled ‘sanctuary cities’. Arizona has followed suit.

Far from greeting the new arrivals with open arms, civic leaders in these cities have screamed blue murder. New York’s mayor has called it ‘horrific’. Chicago’s mayor accuses Abbott of ‘racism’. Washington’s mayor, spooked by a few busloads, has declared an official state of emergency.

When it comes to welcoming illegals, the so-called ‘liberals’ come over all NIMBY — not in my back yard.

They are happy to flaunt their ‘compassion’ when it’s someone else’s problem, but not when it lands on their own doorstep.

Same goes for the ‘refugees welcome’ crowd in Britain. They’re quick to signal their virtue, but reluctant to do anything themselves to help.

Remember Pixie Balls-Cooper reneging on her promise to take Syrian refugees into her own home? Or Wee Burney backtracking on a similar promise? She’s chartered a couple of cruise ships to accommodate those fleeing Putin’s war, rather than overburden municipal housing stock or, heaven forfend, actually billet a Ukrainian family in her official residence.

Manchester’s mayor Andy Burnham is a fierce critic of the Government, but when a few migrants started turning up on his doorstep he complained that the burden should be spread evenly across the country.

The SNP’s porky pub bore Ian Blackford, leader of the party at Westminster, calls the Rwanda plan ‘evil’ and demands an ‘open door’ immigration policy. Labour’s Keir Starmer, a card-carrying yuman rites lawyer, says those camped out at Calais should be allowed to come to Britain legally.

Here’s an idea. When these migrants land in Dover, they could be put on buses and transported to areas where the ‘refugees welcome’ brigade live and work.

Lincoln’s Inn Fields, home of one of the legal profession’s Inns of Court, is in Starmer’s Holborn and St Pancras constituency. It boasts London’s biggest inner city square.

I can remember back in the 1980s when it was a magnet for the homeless. M’learned friends were most put out. After the makeshift camp was forcibly cleared, the gates to the square were locked every night to prevent the homeless getting back in.

With so many lawyers now apparently in favour of illegal immigration, maybe it’s time to establish a permanent migrant settlement at Lincoln’s Inn. I’m sure Starmer’s mates would be delighted.

A fleet of coaches could carry thousands of recent arrivals to Manchester Piccadilly and Pixie Balls-Cooper’s constituency in Yorkshire, and on to Edinburgh, where they could be decanted outside Bute House.

From there, others could be taken to Blackford’s nationalist stronghold of Ross, Skye and Lochaber. Plenty of room there for an unlimited number of itinerant Albanians to amuse themselves.

A Jolly Boys’ Outing to Jolly Jocko Land would be just the ticket.

This week, the hippy-dippy ice cream manufacturer Ben & Jerry’s demanded that our new Home Secretary scraps the Rwanda plan.

I note from Google reviews that the London headquarters of Ben & Jerry’s parent company Unilever has a ‘fabulous canteen’. Perhaps Unilever could open it up to a coachload of migrants rather than sending them to Rwanda.

Somehow, I can’t see that happening any time soon. Still, migrants could always be billeted at the Home Office or the Foreign Office, since only half the staff bother turning up for work these days. I’m sure those Leftie civil servants would be only too thrilled to share their workspaces with a few thousand illegal immigrants.

But if it did happen, it would certainly concentrate the minds of those currently moving heaven and earth to stop the Government tackling the crisis.

Our new Home Secretary should start bussing tomorrow. Make it the Left’s problem, too.

Come on Sue Ellen. Be brave, man.