Can I ignore components of my father’s will I do not agree with?

I have a very sensitive question about whether I can ignore certain parts of my father’s will that I see as cruel or unfair.

My father was a kind and loving man, but also a product of his time, and had a few hardline views that are only coming out after his death.

I am the executor of his will, and there are a couple of sections I want to ignore, if I am legally allowed to.

One is that he has asked that his dog – a six-year-old labrador called Alfie – be put down. His reasoning is that the dog will be bereft and won’t want to live without him.

Another is that he wants certain drawings made by his father to only be kept by the men of the family. His thinking is that, if they are left to women, they could remarry and the drawings would ‘leave the family’.

I object to both points strongly. Do I legally have to respect his wishes?

Sam Barker of This is Money replies: I am sorry to hear of your father’s death, and the lose-lose situation you are presented with as the executor.

You can either respect his wishes and do things you personally disagree with and see as immoral, or you can ignore those sections of the will and worry you have not respected his final wishes.

The good news is that you can just ignore any part of your father’s will that you see as immoral, illegal or impossible.

If in your eyes it is immoral to put Alfie down – and I think most people would agree – then you can refuse to do so, and instead find someone that is happy to take him in and care for him.

Likewise, your father’s wishes about only giving family drawings to men can be ignored too, on the grounds of immorality.

If you are the only executor, then the decision is yours to make, regardless of what other beneficiaries of the will may think.

Ignoring sections of a will can get more complicated, and even end up involving the courts, for example if there is a dispute between executors and beneficiaries. 

I assume there will be no such dispute in the case of Alfie the dog, as I can’t imagine anyone arguing that he should be put down.

I also assume that there will be no argument over redistributing the drawings to anyone that wants them, regardless of gender.

But as this is such a tricky and sensitive subject, I spoke to a lawyer to get expert advice.

Lisa Flaherty, an associate at law firm Anderson Strathern said: ‘When you die, your executors are legally bound to enact the instructions outlined in your will. 

‘However, there are exceptions. A general rule of thumb for what can’t be enacted is anything that is illegal, immoral or impossible. Illegal and impossible are usually straightforward to define, but whether something is immoral or not may be a grey area.

‘The recent case of French film star Alain Delon asking for his dog to be put down and buried with him when he died would be very likely to be judged to be immoral here in the UK. 

‘There have also been cases where someone left money to a relative in their will, but on the condition that they marry a person of their choice, or divorce their current spouse. 

‘Both could definitely be considered immoral.

‘A fairly common request that could be considered reasonable, though, is leaving a house to a family member but only if they agree to live in it. 

‘Some may argue that this is immoral, but there could be a justification – such as when a house has been in the family for many generations.’

Get a will right first time 

The subject of making a will and carrying it out is a very tricky one, and sadly there are countless cases where this can run into difficulty, especially with issues of morality.

In the case of your father’s will, it seems you can just ignore the parts you find immoral, provided no-one mentioned in the will objects.

But this could also be a reminder to make sure that conditions in our own wills are legal and clear, even if what constitutes a moral will varies from person to person.

Flaherty added: ‘If you intend to make a condition such as this in your will, I’d advise making it explicitly clear what your intentions are because leaving conditions in a will can be a minefield.

‘For example, if you leave money to someone on the condition that they look after your dog, they could theoretically take that dog for a very short time, and then give it away. 

‘So, if you want someone to look after your pet for the rest of its life, the wording of your will should spell that out.

‘But what if the person fully intends to look after your pet for the rest of its life but then they become unwell or move into care? 

‘Would you still want them to receive the money? A good adviser will guide you through this process and highlight any potential loopholes.’