One girl has revealed she has such excessive requirements that she has an entire record of ‘non-negotiables’ males have to satisfy earlier than relationship her – together with being a feminist and “going beyond the bare minimum”.
Phoebe Brooks, 21, put collectively her record of 13 “high standards” along with her pal, Jemma McCoubrey, 21, after turning into single originally of the 12 months.
The beauty- who’s learning movie manufacturing at Gloucestershire University – says anybody she dates needs to be a feminist and “understand what we [women] put up with”. She needs all ladies to be with a person who’s form, mature, and who doesn’t should be “mothered”. Phoebe additionally needs somebody who’s clear and tidy and has good pals with “no cheats”.
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She says her calls for have been known as “high standards” however she believes it’s not an excessive amount of to ask for.
(Image: Phoebe Brooks / SWNS)
Phoebe, initially from Farnham, Surrey, mentioned: “I needed a list to remind myself what is non-negotiable. I’ve got it on my wall – it’s a cute reminder.
“I’ve been told I’m high maintenance. I don’t think I am. Most of them are not big asks – they are the bare minimum. These are absolute non-negotiables.”
Phoebe – who is now in a relationship – believes a boyfriend should be a best friend and wants them to be emotionally intelligent. She said: “I’ve always wanted that classic true love. You grow together. Everyone should have someone who is open-minded to change.”
(Image: Phoebe Brooks / SWNS)
Phoebe’s record of requirements
- Be her finest pal
- Be form to everybody / understanding and emotionally clever
- Be open-minded
- Be loyal, sincere and respectful
- Understand ladies – “periods, our bodies, inequality and what we put up with”
- Good communication
- Be mature
- Have good pals – no cheats
- Protective not controlling
- Good priorities and goals in life
- Be affected person and delicate
- Go past the naked minimal
- Clean and tidy
Loyalty, respect and honesty are additionally key traits Phoebe appears to be like for in a companion. “Loyalty is the bare minimum,” said Phoebe. “They need to understand women and what we put up with.”
Phoebe wants her partner to be a feminist and believe in equality – and says strangers have been outraged by it. She said: “Being a feminist just means you think women should be equal. If you disagree that’s bizarre. People were raged.”
Good communication can also be key for the coed. “You can’t have a relationship with out good communication,” she said. “It’s frustrating growing up as a girl. People say boys mature slower. I’ve never listened to that. If boys had to deal with half the things girls do – they’d grow up too.”
There’s no point dating Phoebe if you don’t have good friends either, as she said a man’s maters ‘help her decide whether she wants to be with them’.
Phoebe also wants a protective partner but wants them to respect boundaries and not become controlling.
(Image: Phoebe Brooks / SWNS)
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It’s essential her companion shares the identical goals and values in life too. “You have to have the same aims in life,” she mentioned. “People think it’s weird to ask if you want marriage or kids this young but how do you know if you want to be with someone? It’s about growing together while both having different careers.”
Phoebe believes most of her standards should be expected and wants men to go above and beyond. She said: “Go beyond the bare minimum. It’s little things – like telling you how much you mean to them. My boyfriend will come a day early and surprise me. That’s all I mean.”
She doesn’t want to be with someone she has to “mother” either, and says she needs a partner who does cooking and cleaning.
Phoebe says some men have been left ‘angered’ by her list, which she brands “scary”. She’s determined to share her record to indicate some ladies that they ‘deserve higher’.