What was it about billionaire Prince Albert of Monaco that attracted so many ladies?
Was it his private allure — or his beautiful, bulging, deep pockets? Albert is the son of gorgeous Grace Kelly and dashing Prince Rainier, however even his greatest buddies would battle to pinpoint precisely the place his private fortune ends and his private magnetism begins. However, Albert by no means let this lack of charisma cease him from chasing (and catching) the babes.
For many years he has constructed a repute as a philanderer whose actions have been bombproofed by excessive regal privilege; an unabashed lover who did what he wished, with whom he wished, when he wished.
And as claims emerge this week about secret financial institution accounts used to fund his former lovers and illegitimate kids, one can solely be grateful that Prince Andrew — his fellow royal madman throughout the water — has little of Prince Albert’s willpower and vitality in terms of being a playboy.
To recap. Albert’s 13-year marriage to Princess Charlene has produced twins Gabriella and Jacques (aged 9) — nevertheless it doesn’t appear to have made both of their dad and mom blissful. Can that be a shock? Over the years Charlene has been hospitalised with exhaustion, she by no means smiles and was MIA for a curiously very long time with sinus issues, amid hypothesis that no less than a few of her points haven’t been helped by Albert’s earlier conquests.
To recap. Albert’s 13-year marriage to Princess Charlene has produced twins Gabriella and Jacques (aged 9) — nevertheless it doesn’t appear to have made both of their dad and mom blissful
One can solely be grateful that Prince Andrew — his fellow royal madman throughout the water — has little of Prince Albert’s willpower and vitality in terms of being a playboy
At the final public rely he has two illegitimate kids: Jazmin Grimaldi, 31, was the product of a short fling with property agent Tamara Rotolo, whereas Alexandre Grimaldi-Coste, 20, was born after his affair with Nicole Coste, a former Air France flight attendant.
Of course, one by no means is aware of the place and when Cupid’s arrow will strike, even in case you are a prince. Yet all this does counsel a sure energetic opportunism and a decided romantic follow-through from the Monegasque ruler. Compare this with our very personal royal lumpen lothario — and breathe a sigh of aid there are not any love kids!
Doltish Prince Andrew says he can’t even bear in mind assembly Virginia Giuffre, who as a 17-year-old was allegedly trafficked to London and ordered to have intercourse with him in a shower in a Belgravia mews home.
It’s the sort of knee-trembling occasion, like anniversaries or particular birthdays or the day he proposed or crashed the automobile, that you simply hope a man would always remember. Yet in terms of his personal peccadilloes, actual or imagined, the person previously often known as Randy Andy has no recollection of even assembly Virginia. Even although she claims she was virtually served as much as him on a silver platter, like a sizzling canape at a palace reception.
In the civil sexual assault case that ensued a few years later, Andrew continued to keep up his innocence however paid Virginia a £12 million settlement; a excessive value for the costliest reminiscence lapse in royal historical past since Henry VIII forgot he was married to Catherine of Aragon when he met Anne Boleyn.
Still, I’m wondering if all this has one thing to do with British restraint, in distinction to Mediterranean flamboyance. While Prince Albert of Monaco was on the market, on it, popping champagne corks in a silk cravat whereas chatting up air hostesses and property brokers, our royals are slightly tweedier and extra circumspect in terms of tea and nudge, nudge crumpet. Not to say timid. Like shy voles within the mating season, they not often enterprise outdoors their very own burrows when within the temper for love.
Look on the King, who had an extended affair with Camilla, the spouse of certainly one of his greatest buddies, Andrew Parker Bowles. Who had, hearsay suggests, as soon as dated Princess Anne. Charles was even an obliging godfather to Camilla and Andrew’s son, Tom.
If they weren’t all so posh, they’d be occurring seaside holidays collectively to Devon, ingesting cups of tea with a shared tartan travelling rug over their knees. This is how the British do it: minimal effort, preserve it cosy, jolly good present, cheers all spherical, can I tempt you with one other spouse?
It is sort of quaint compared to the scandal grenade that has exploded in Monaco. The pin was pulled by a disgruntled accountant who labored for Prince Albert and the Grimaldi household and was aware of all their darkest monetary secrets and techniques. (Game Of Thrones rule primary: by no means gruntle your accountant.)
Yet Claude Palermo was a lot greater than a book-keeper. For the 20 years that he labored for Prince Albert, he was the Cardinal Richelieu to his boss’s King Louis XIII, a detailed confidant who knew all the things in regards to the Grimaldi household fortune and all of the princely property offers in a principality famously often known as a sunny place for shady folks.
He additionally knew who was spending what, together with Princess Charlene’s seeming incapability to maintain to a funds of £1.2 million a 12 months whereas nonetheless reportedly hiring unlawful immigrants on £85 a day. Meanwhile, huge sums have been apparently draining from the swamp to furnish Albert’s illegitimate kids with luxurious houses and their respective moms with incomes.
To be frank, I love Albert for offering generously for his offspring — that’s the one good factor in his favour.
It could be unfair, however in comparable circumstances I can simply think about the penny-pinching Windsors bickering over heating payments and college charges, whereas paying up begrudgingly and querying each final expense. Another pair of trainers? Can’t the boy make do with final 12 months’s spats? And so on.
So because the scandal continues to engulf the Grimaldis and the residents of Monaco have each proper to really feel brief modified by the revolting extravagance, allow us to be grateful that Prince Andrew was simply too lazy to get himself into so many romantic scrapes as priapic, unstoppable Prince Albert. And simply too uninteresting to assume past Pitch@Palace on the enterprise and commerce area.
Still, this Monegasque mess is a grim warning about what a puffed-up prince with little objective in life will rise up to, whether or not he’s based mostly in Monaco, Mummy’s House or wherever else.