Tom Brady‘s failed marriage to Brazilian supermodel Gisele Bundchen wasn’t off limits during a savage Netflix roast – but it was another topic that left him red-faced.
‘The Roast of Tom Brady’ was every bit as brutal as fans would have hoped, with the Birmingham City investor left squirming in his seat repeatedly during an X-rated broadcast. The 46-year-old signed up to the show, a star-studded production billed as the ‘Greatest Roast of All Time’, knowing it would be full of controversy.
Topics all considered fair game for jokes included the legendary quarter-back’s much-publicised divorce from Gisele after 13 years of marriage. Plus his former side the New England Patriots’ multiple cheating scandals, his sexuality, and even his looks.
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Former team-mate at the New England Patriots, Drew Bledsoe, told Brady: “I’ve experienced a couple of things that you’ll never experience. The feeling of being the No. 1 overall draft pick in the NFL. And a 28th wedding anniversary; it was yesterday.”
And his break-up with Gisele certainly wasn’t off limits when Kevin Hart took to the mic, with the US comedian also taking aim at the model’s jiu-jitsu trainer boyfriend Joaquim Valente. He joked that Brady left Patriots coach Bill Belichick “high and dry” when he ditched the side for the Tampa Bay Buccaneers.
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(Image: Netflix)
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Telling Brady that he “f***ed him good”, Hart added: “You did, Tom, you f***ed your coach, but let me tell you something people… that’s what you’ve got to do to maintain your happiness.”
Brady smiled but looked distinctly uncomfortable as Hart then delivered the killer blow. He said: “You sometimes got to f*** your coach. You know who else f***ed their coach? Gisele. She f***ed that karate man.
“I mean Jesus Christ, Tom. One of the smartest quarterbacks ever played a game. How did you not see this coming? Eight f***ing karate classes a day,” the comedian said.
“Eight karate classes a day and she’s still a white belt. F*** Tom. The only bruises she had were on her ass. everybody should have known it,” he joked. Brady held up this drink and took a few stern sips before shaking his head.
(Image: GC Images)
That joke followed Gisele denying speculation that she began her romance with Valente before splitting up with Brady. “That’s a lie,” she told the New York Times. “This is something that happens to a lot of women who get blamed when they have the courage to leave an unhealthy relationship and are labelled as being unfaithful.”
Gisele and Valente first met in December 2021, but reportedly did not start dating until June 2023. They were spotted together in Miami and Costa Rica in 2022, but she insisted at that stage they were just friends.
Brady and Gisele – who share son, Benjamin, 14, and daughter, Vivian, 11, from a 13-year marriage, finalised their divorce in October 2022. Brady also has a son, Jack, 16, with ex-girlfriend Bridget Moynahan.
However, it was another subject that really triggered the NFL icon, as America’s ‘Roastmaster General’ Jeff Ross referred to a scenario when Brady introduced himself to Patriots owner Robert Kraft.
“Tom became a Patriot, moved up to New England, and on the first day of training camp, that scrawny rookie famously walked into the owner Robert Kraft’s office and said, I’m the greatest decision your organisation has ever made… would you like a massage,” Ross joked.
The gag was a reference to when Kraft was charged with soliciting a prostitute back in 2019, which drew gasp and laughs from across the room. But Brady appeared unimpressed and approached Ross mid-set.
“Don’t say that s*** again,” Brady said with a smile, while his hand poorly covered up the microphone.
Kraft was one of 25 people facing a misdemeanour charge for soliciting prostitution at a Florida day spa in February 2019. He pleaded not guilty and the charges were dropped in September of 2019 after a Florida appeals court ruled his constitutional rights were violated.
Kraft’s attorneys revealed hidden cameras were installed at the spa before he visited under the guise of a response to a bomb threat. In March that year Kraft had told the media he was “truly sorry,” adding: “I know I have hurt and disappointed my family, my close friends, my co-workers, our fans and many others who rightfully hold me to a higher standard.”