Liberal America has delivered a guilty verdict gut-punch: Number 45 is now a convicted felon – and his frothing, foaming foes are as smug as they are predictable.
MS-DNC, the Clucking Nitwit Network and the histrionic hens of The View were all as giddy as Taylor Swift mid first-kiss.
After six weeks of foreplay, cameras trained 24/7 on the blank walls of the Manhattan courthouse, these juvenile jackjaws let their orgasmic orations explode into guilty goo.
Following just 12 hours of deliberation, New York’s 12 ordinary men called time, and CNN‘s doughty Dana Bash delivered her expert insight:
‘The nation is now holding its breath […] you’re going to have a former President, sitting in a courtroom listening to what 12 ordinary people decided.’
Thank you, Justice Brandeis!
Hallelujah, sang MSNBC’s Rachel Maddow – who praised an ‘impeccable’ trial as the 34 counts rolled in.
And woke Hollywood… saw God!
Right off the phone with raging Robert De Niro, red-headed lady-monster Kathy Griffin – of Trump severed head fame – said she was crying ‘tears of joy.’
Hallelujah, sang MSNBC’s Rachel Maddow – who praised an ‘impeccable’ trial as the 34 counts rolled in.
Right off the phone with raging Robert De Niro, red-headed lady-monster Kathy Griffin – of Trump severed head fame – said she was crying ‘tears of joy.’
Also soaking up the celebration juice, DA ‘Get Trump’ Bragg and his rictus-grinning lawfare lackies waddled up to the press podium.
How do you feel about your ‘masterful and flawless’ prosecution, asked one particularly bum-sucking journo. Put your panties back on, mister!
Working woman of the hour, Stormy Daniels, relayed her ’empathy’ for Convict Don via her lawyer which was about as believable as Pinocchio Cohen’s treacherous testimony.
Meanwhile, across the flaming Rubicon, former Trump adversary Megyn Kelly was spitting stiletto fire, and speaking for right-thinking Americans everywhere:
‘The country is disgraced. Alvin Bragg should be disbarred. They will rue the day.’
Go get ’em, Meg!
Nor was Coiffed Caitlyn Jenner a happy camperette. America’s greatest Olympian (let’s be honest, she could take Michael Phelps in a fistfight) seethed at the ‘outrageous’ proceedings.
Soaking up the celebration juice, DA ‘Get Trump’ Bragg and his rictus-grinning lawfare lackies waddled up to the press podium.
And even Meatball Ron DeSantis managed to pull on his high heels and trot out a yawn-a-thon statement condemning the ‘Kangaroo court’.
And what a circus of rabid animals it has been.
It wasn’t just washed-up dog De Niro finger-waving and barking outside the courthouse at Trump supporters. (‘You are gangsters, f*** you!’)
No, pre-verdict Thursday we saw a big-breasted MAGA maniac arrested for smashing her woman weapons against an anti-Trump troll.
As cops dragged her off, it felt rather like the beginning of a low-rent adult film but, then again, hasn’t this whole charade?
A British couple holidaying in humid Manhattan seemingly wandered into the raving rabble only to receive shouts of, ‘F*** the Queen!’
Pre-verdict Thursday we saw a big-breasted MAGA maniac arrested for smashing her woman weapons against an anti-Trump troll.
Meatball Ron DeSantis managed to pull on his high heels and trot out a yawn-a-thon statement condemning the ‘Kangaroo court’. And what a circus of rabid animals it has bee
And an unemployed – unemployable – man in a prison jumpsuit and rubber Trump mask danced like an ape.
This madness has now taken a deeply disturbing turn, our politics too crazy to quantify.
Republicans vowing to move to Somalia (moving to Canada is SO Amy Schumer) will no doubt stay long enough to grudge-vote Biden out the Oval in November.
But today, no victory was won.
What every millionaire, mumma or Average Joe collecting belly button lint must realize is – if they can do it to him, they can do it to you, too.