A man has sparked a heated debate after confessing he refused to foot the bill for his date‘s dinner over her looks.
The 28-year-old alleged that his date had doctored her photos to appear more appealing online – a move that left him feeling deceived.
He shared how he arranged to meet a 26-year-old woman after connecting with her on a dating app, and made sure to spruce himself up for the occasion. However, upon arriving at the restaurant, he realised that his date had heavily edited her profile pictures as she bore no resemblance to them in person.
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He shared on Reddit: “Her profile had several pictures, and she looked quite fit, which is my type since I try to lead a healthy lifestyle myself. However, when I met her in person, she was significantly heavier than she appeared in her pictures. I’m talking about a noticeable difference, not just bad angles. I believe in honesty and felt misled, but I didn’t want to embarrass her or make her feel bad, so I decided to just continue with the date. “.
He admits the conversation was “alright” but he wasn’t physically attracted to her because she was ‘heavier’ than she portrayed. So, instead of paying for her meal, he chose to leave her with the bill as he felt “misled”. He added: “I also didn’t compliment her as I usually might because I didn’t want to be dishonest about my feelings of attraction.”
After their meal, the couple parted ways, but he later received a barrage of angry messages from her, expressing her disappointment with their date. He defended himself saying: “She was upset that I didn’t pay for her meal or compliment her, claiming it made her feel unattractive. She said it was the first time a guy didn’t pay for her.
“I tried to be honest and told her that her pictures were misleading and that I was not attracted to overweight women as it’s my preference, which only made her more furious. She labelled me as shallow and a misogynist. Yet, she had a specific height requirement in her bio, which I find somewhat hypocritical.
“Generally, I’m all for footing the bill on dates, especially when I have a good time and feel a connection. However, I don’t like the idea of paying when I feel that someone hasn’t been truthful, or the date was just not enjoyable or the person was rude.”
Seeking validation, he turned to social media to ask users whether he was in the wrong. One user responded: “I wish men that claim to want a woman with an ‘active lifestyle’ would just admit they want someone thin. I’ve been a thin couch potato. I’ve also run a marathon at 30lbs overweight. I wonder which of these he would prefer.”
Another user added: “I don’t think my husband and I complimented each other on our first dates, we were spending too much time having fun talking and joking around to bother. I don’t know if I’ve ever complimented anyone on a first date, or even noticed if someone hadn’t complimented me. Who cares? You can tell if someone’s attracted to you or likes being around you. Show, don’t tell, etc.”
A third user shared: “I date both men and women. I’m also fat. Men are much, much, much more likely to have outright lies in their photos (like using a 15-year-old photo). Men just don’t know how to look at a picture of someone and gauge their physicality. I’ve never had this issue with women – it doesn’t matter how much you use angles, photoshop, etc – you can still tell when it’s a fat person trying to hide being fat.
“All my photos are honest and, in fact, I’ve lost about 30kg since some of them were taken and I’ve still had dudes accuse me of being ‘fatter than your photos’. The actual truth is that men don’t know s*** about women or photography.”
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