Friday night sees the return of the Premier League with Fulham travelling to Old Trafford to take on Erik ten Hag’s Manchester United.
Last weekend, the Football League got their season underway, with fans from all across the country excited to get back on the road to follow their teams fortunes for what they hope will be a successful season. Away days are an experience, with no trip ever the same – bar the copious amounts of alcohol usually consumed.
However, despite the location always changing, some believe there is a sacrosanct routine that must be followed when it comes to how an away day pans out. And according to Facebook page Away Day Tours, this is how the ideal away trip for a football fan should play out.
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A post on their Facebook page, which has just shy of 100,000 followers, stated: “5:30am: Alarm, 6:15am: Cans out of the fridge, taxi to the coach pick-up. 6:30am: First can open, 8:30am: 5 cans in, join the back of the bus toilet queue, 9:30am: £2 on football card, 10am: Pub Stop – Jägers in!, 11am: Have a sing-song with other Coaches.
“11:30am: Set off to the stadium, 13:00am: Light hearted gestures to the opposition fans through the window, 2:15pm: Moshpit in the concourse, 3pm: Too drunk to care what the score is, 5:10pm: Back on bus, check your 5-fold acca, say you’re “never betting again”,
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(Image: Facebook/Away Day Tours)
“7pm: 15 pints/cans, 4 jägers and 2 sambucca’s deep, 8pm: Your mates asleep, 9pm: Back off the bus, debating whether to go out or not, 12pm: Passed out. NOTHING BEATS AWAY DAYS!”
Clearly feeling the page had left something major out, some football fans implied there was an element of the away day schedule that was missing. One fan wrote: “We all know what’s missing from that list lol” adding a winking face and a snowflake emoji.
A second, less subtle fan commented: “At wot point do the bags get opened.” A third bluntly wrote: “Missing bag of Ching and a row…maybe get lucky in da club later other than that perfect.” And a fourth said: “You missed the massive bag of sniff.”
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However, there were also plenty of replies to the ‘boozy schedule’ that believed it to be the stuff of fantasy, and something that had clearly been concocted by Jay Cartwright from the Inbetweeners.
“These posts get more and more boring every season,” replied one follower. Another added: “Can’t be representative of an average fan! Too drunk to care about score? Don’t get it.”
A third said: “Can’t understand why anyone goes to a away to get absolutely plastered so they don’t see the game & I like a beer or 2 but I also like to remember the game.” A fourth commented: “How many more of these ‘banter’ pages are going to post the same old sh*t?”