Heartbreaking remaining message the Blur drummer’s ex-wife despatched: British lady recorded poignant clip earlier than she travelled to Dignitas in Switzerland to die alone – which was then launched within the wake of her demise

A cancer sufferer who travelled to Dignitas to die alone recorded a heartbreaking final message pleading for a change to the UK’s law criminalising assisted dying. 

Paola Marra, 53, who was the ex-wife of Blur drummer Dave Rowntree, ended her life at the controversial Swiss clinic in March having fought breast and bowel cancer. 

In a poignant clip, released after her death at Dignitas, she called for people to have the right to ‘end their suffering on their own terms’.  

Ms Marra said that although ‘when you watch this, I will be dead’, ‘you watching this could help change the laws around assisted dying’.

In an accompanying letter, she told party leaders in Westminster she had been forced to die alone because she did not want her loved ones ‘to be questioned by the police or get into trouble’.

This week, Rowntree spoke out about his ex-wife’s death for the first time, echoing her final plea.

Paola Marra said she felt she had no choice but to travel to the Dignitas site in Switzerland in March

Blur drummer Dave Rowntree (pictured) slammed ‘psychopathic’ laws on assisted death in the UK

Paola Marra, 53, who was the ex-wife of Blur drummer Dave Rowntree, ended her life at the controversial Swiss clinic in March having fought breast and bowel cancer

Although the couple divorced in 2000, Rowntree, 60, had supported Ms Marra before her final journey. 

The drummer slammed the ‘psychopathic’ laws on assisted death in the UK, saying they leave people facing the ‘brutal’ dilemma of wanting to end their lives, but not being able to legally ask others to help them.

Rowntree’s comments came just weeks before a new bill is published proposing changes to the law on assisted dying in England and Wales under strict controls.

At present, a person suspected of assisting a death can face up to 14 years in prison in the UK. 

Speaking to The Guardian for the first time about his wife’s ordeal, Rowntree said the law as it stood was unfair to those who are suffering and terminally ill.

He said: ‘This is psychopathic where we are now, because the whole point of this is to try and make things easier for the real victim in this – the terminally ill person.’

Rowntree, who is a trained lawyer and practiced for five years before pursuing a music career, added that any change to the law should operate under tight restrictions.

‘I certainly wouldn’t support any bill that allows anyone to kill anyone else,’ he said.

Paola Marra teamed up with renowned photographer Rankin to speak out about assisted dying

A file photograph of a bed in the Dignitas assisted dying clinic in Pfaffikon, Switzerland

Rowntree, top centre, with fellow Blur members Alex James, Graham Coxon and Damon Albarn

Paola Marra stands outside the London Underground station in East Finchley, where she lived

One of the family photographs of Paola Marra in the video released  after her death

Rowntree said the current law results in people who wish to end their lives ‘creeping around like criminals’.

What are the UK laws on assisted suicide?

Assisted suicide is banned in England, Wales and Northern Ireland, with a maximum prison sentence of 14 years.

In Scotland, it is not a specific criminal offence but assisting the death of someone can leave a person open to murder or other charges.

It is currently legal in Switzerland, as well as several US states, Australia and New Zealand.

Advertisement

He added: ‘Not only that, but when the time comes, if they do decide to die with dignity, and end their life in a time of their choosing, and in a way of their choosing, they have to do it unsupported by anyone, on their own, not able to hold anyone’s hand, not able to hug somebody and say goodbye.’

Back in March, Ms Morra teamed up with renowned photographer Rankin to create her heartbreaking message. 

In full, she said: ‘When you watch this, I will be dead. I’m choosing to seek assisted dying because I refuse to let a terminal illness dictate the terms of my existence.

‘The pain and suffering can become unbearable. It’s a slow erosion of dignity, the loss of independence, the stripping away of everything that makes life worth living.

 ‘Assisted dying is not about giving up. In fact, it’s about reclaiming control. It’s not about death. It’s about dignity.

‘It’s about giving people the right to end their suffering on their own terms, with compassion and respect.

‘So as you watch this, I am dead. But you watching this could help change the laws around assisted dying.’ 

Ms Morra, who worked in the music industry and charity sector, was born in Canada but lived in London for more than 35 years. 

She first found she had breast cancer in 2017, then bowel cancer was also discovered three years later – and she was told it was incurable by 2021.

In a film released after her death in March, Paola Marra used a series of family photographs to illustrate her life

The Dignitas assisted dying clinic is located in Pfaffikon, near Zurich in Switzerland (file image)

A waiting room in the Dignitas assisted dying clinic in Pfaffikon, Switzerland (file picture)

She described her treatment as ‘brutal’ and said she could no longer take many painkillers.

Assisted suicide is banned in England, Wales and Northern Ireland, with a maximum prison sentence of 14 years.

In Scotland, it is not a specific criminal offence but assisting the death of someone can leave a person open to murder or other charges.

The situation is different in Ms Marra’s former home of Canada, which legalised assisted death in 2016 for people with a terminal illness under its ‘Medical Assistance In Dying’ (Maid) programme.

This was expanded in 2021 to people with incurable, but not terminal, conditions.

Terminally-ill broadcaster Esther Rantzen is an advocate for reform in the UK, as are a swathe of other well-known names including author Terry Pratchett and actors Susan Sarandon and Patrick Stewart.

But critics say any reform could open the way for ‘state-sanctioned killing’.

Labour MP Kim Leadbeater’s private member’s bill to legalise assisted dying in England and Wales will get its second reading, involving an MPs’ vote, on 29 November.