You know the feeling. A sudden recoil when a man you were quite keen on does something that makes your skin crawl.
One minute you’re planning your future together, the next you can’t bear the thought of him touching your hand.
Welcome to the ‘ick’. A feeling that, once there, is impossible to shake – and of course it works both ways.
Recently, my Daily Mail colleague John Sturgis shared his thoughts on the women’s fashions that men hate, as well as the beauty trends that are ‘man-repelling’.
In the interests of fairness, I wanted women to have their say, and I’ve gone one step further than mere matters of style and grooming.
After countless conversations with women everywhere, I’ve compiled the definitive list of male icks.
Some are universal truths, others delightfully specific – from running with a backpack to waving at strangers.
Brace yourself chaps: these women take no prisoners!
Appearance
Long toenails and unkept feet: ‘I went out with one guy who was so sexy, but when he took his socks off, his feet were disgusting. He’d spent all that time in the gym but forgot the basics.’
Men who go to nail bars to get manicures and pedicures: ‘I don’t mind metrosexual men but when my boyfriend said, “I’ll come with you” when I was going to get my nails done, it was the biggest turn-off ever.’
Spending triple the amount of time I take to get ready: ‘Like what is he doing?’.
Clammy hands: ‘You don’t want them anywhere near you and why is he all sweaty? Is he freaked out by me?’
Expert Tracey Cox (pictured) revealed the many things women have noticed men to that give them the ick in a relationship
Wearing short sleeve cotton shirts: ‘Even worse if his arms are puny.’
Ankle length trousers: ‘If you want to look like an estate agent, fine, but otherwise…’
Crocs: ‘A guy turned up to a Tinder date wearing them. I walked straight past and pretended I hadn’t seen him.’
Ankle ‘no show’ socks: ‘They’re for women not men.’
Speedos: ‘Even Daniel Craig can’t pull them off.’
Secretly checking themselves out whenever they walk past a mirror: ‘My ex used to pout and fluff his hair whenever he saw his reflection. I felt embarrassed for him.’
Hygiene
Bad breath or BO: ‘Surely this is a dealbreaker for every woman in the world? If not, it should be.’
Constant throat clearing: ‘Once you’re heard it, you can’t unhear it. It drives me insane.’
Shiny wet lips: ‘Is he drooling? Or licking his lips? Why are they wet?’
Smelly clothes: ‘There is no excuse and it’s revolting.’
Smelly facial hair: ‘If you insist on having a beard or moustache, at least keep it clean.’
The smell of last night’s alcohol from their skin and breath: ‘My sister once smelt my boyfriend’s morning after breath and rushed to the loo to be sick. Yes, that bad.’
Bad teeth: ‘I can cope it they’re crooked but not if they’re stained or it’s clear he hasn’t seen a hygienist ever.’
Bleached teeth: ‘He’s obsessed with his appearance – and has terrible taste. As bad as fake tan.’
Giving too much information on their toilet habits: ‘Why do men insist on oversharing about when they last did or didn’t go to the loo and what happened there.’
Taking ages to pack and not being able to manage life without help from their partner are both ‘icky’ (stock image)
Behaviour
Running with a backpack on: ‘I’m not sure why it’s such an ick for me but I can’t stand it.’
Taking ages to pack: ‘There’s something sexy about a man who chucks three things in a bag with a toothbrush and is ready to go.’
Dithering around: ‘It’s just so unmanly and old mannish.’
Not being able to manage his life without help from me: ‘It’s like having another child. Deeply unsexy.’
Pathetic road rage incidents: ‘I was in a car with my ex when he got out at a traffic light and smashed his fist on the windscreen of a girl who had ‘cut him off’. She was terrified and I dumped him over it.’
Refusing to read instructions or ask the way when lost: ‘Does it show a weakness or something? Grow up!’
Waving at someone who wasn’t waving at them: ‘I went out with a guy who had a motorbike which I found hot – until he took me on the back and waved at every other person on a bike. None of them waved back.’
Bigging himself up in public in front of you when you know it’s all a lie: ‘It makes him look small and pathetic.’
Ogling other women in front of you and pretending they haven’t: ‘Do they think women are really stupid or don’t have eyes?’
Telling lame jokes and sulking when you don’t laugh: ‘He made me watch reels that were ‘hilarious’ then got huffy when I didn’t laugh.’
Drops plans with you to see his friends but will never change plans with them to suit you: ‘The giveaway of how little he respects you.’
Speaks badly: ‘It’s probably being snobby, but I can’t be with a man who doesn’t know how to speak properly or swears a lot.’
Thinks he’s better than everyone: ‘If he looks down on anyone I love, he’s out.’
So self-absorbed, he wouldn’t notice if you dropped dead in front of him: ‘It wasn’t just all about him, it was never, ever about anyone else.’
Thinks he’s a hard nut when you could punch him out: ‘Just accept your limitations.’
Treats restaurant staff and sales assistants badly: ‘All my girlfriends have this rule: if he’s rude to the staff, go to the loo and don’t come back.’
He’s incapable of just listening: ‘We all know men like fixing things, but can I at least get four sentences out before you’re barking a solution at me.’
Food
Only eating beige food: ‘He was like the guy in Shirley Valentine. If it’s not egg and chips, he wasn’t interested.’
Not being able to cook anything: ‘It screams mummy issues to me and that he can’t look after himself.’
Eating crisps loudly: ‘Especially if you’re watching television but even if you’re not watching telly.’
Shovelling in food or eating with his mouth open: ‘The first date went so well but he blew it the minute we went for a meal together. It was disgusting.’
Chores
Never suggesting going out anywhere: ‘It’s always me who has to make the plans.’
Expecting me to remember every birthday and anniversary: ‘And he gets annoyed if I forget and it makes him look bad.’
Watching telly with his feet up while I run around cooking and cleaning up and making the lunches – then expecting sex once we’re in bed: ‘It’s the thing every woman in the world has moaned about and still men sit there.’
Wanting praise every time they ‘help you’: ‘Why is it my job to look after both of us? Do I ask for thanks for all the million things I do?’
Putting things near the dishwasher or near the laundry basket rather than in there: ‘Would it kill him to lift a lid or open a door?’
Attitude
Showing off when ordering wine in a restaurant: ‘He wouldn’t know a red from a white but still he swished it about and tasted it like he knew what he’s doing.’
Being selfish not generous: ‘With time, money, affection – anything.’
Being small-minded: ‘Nothing creeps me out more than men who are provincial.’
Being sexist: ‘One strike and you’re out.’
Acting like women and men are from different planets: ‘Things like, ‘Women, eh?’ Or ‘What man really understands women?’. Are you 95?’
Refusing to admit that other men are attractive: ‘When I first heard this, I thought it was the most ridiculous thing I’d ever heard. Why can’t a man look at another man and sum up his attractiveness?’
Not sticking up for you when his family are treating you badly: ‘It’s grounds for divorce and often causes it.’
Not having any ambition and finding successful women threatening: ‘So unattractive. Be proud not jealous.’
Manners
Continuing to talk when people are bored of listening to him: ‘Men who can’t read the room are terrible.’
Talking over people: ‘Especially when their point or conversation is better – which is usually is.’
Not picking up the bill on the first date: ‘Splitting the bill later is fine. But seriously, the first date?’
Inability to take feedback on anything: ‘How are you ever going to solve problems?’
Getting drunk and totally embarrassing themselves and you: ‘At first, it’s funny. Not so funny when you realise this is the norm.’
Not knowing how to use cutlery properly: ‘American men are known for this.’
Bad table manners: ‘I took a date to dinner with my family, and he’d practically finished eating before any of us had picked up a knife and fork.’
Continuing to talk when people are bored of listening can give a major ick (stock image)
Socials
Using girly emojis in messages: ‘Who signs off with a flower emoji apart from 12-year-old girls?’
Liking posts of sexy women on Instagram and not understanding why that’s a deal breaker: ‘Ever noticed how they suddenly get your point when you do it back?’
Having a list of followers that’s just hot women: ‘Does he not realise the first thing women do when they find a guy on socials is to look at who he follows?’
Posting selfies where they think they look hot: ‘Even if they are, it’s off-putting and vain.’
Posting too much on social media: ‘You just know a conspiracy theory is two minutes away.’
Being useless with technology and not even attempting to understand it: ‘Nothing ages a man more.’
Romance
Using cringy nicknames: ‘Bubs, babe, baby – that’s the biggest ick of all for me.’
Talking in a baby voice: ‘Does he want a girlfriend or a mother?’
Kissing with too much tongue: ‘It was gross: all stiff. I felt like I had an ironing board in my mouth.’
Putting rose petals on the bed: ‘Could he be any more naff?’
Using the expression ‘Happy wife, happy life’: ‘You know instantly your role is the 50s housewife.’
You’ll find more info about sex and relationships at traceycox.com. Follow Tracey on Instagram @traceycoxsexauthor.