Strictly star Robin Windsor took his personal life in lodge room after struggling years of despair, inquest guidelines

A Strictly Come Dancing star who left a suicide note saying the BBC ‘destroyed me’ after he was dropped from the show was ‘vulnerable to rejection both emotionally and professionally’, an inquest jury has concluded.

Robin Windsor, a professional Latin and ballroom dancer who featured in four series from 2010 and 2013, took an overdose while staying at The Hoxton Hotel in Shepherd’s Bush, west London, on February 19 2024.

Windsor’s body was discovered by a receptionist after he failed to check out of his room – with police later finding two suicide messages.

The first, to a friend, said: ‘This all really started when I lost my job on Strictly. The way they treated me destroyed me. It started me on the road I’m still on. All I wanted from life was to be happy. I loved my job more than anyone else.’

He went on to say he was permanently in a ‘dark place’ and couldn’t go on ‘living like this any more’.

Windsor’s second note, to his ex-partner actor Ollie Augustin, said: ‘I need you to understand that this is not your fault.’

After two hours of deliberations, jurors at West London Coroner’s Court recorded Windsor’s death as suicide on Thursday, adding he was ‘vulnerable to rejection both emotionally and professionally’. 

The inquest, overseen by Dr Anton van Dellen, concluded Windor’s medical cause of death as a combination of consuming alcohol and drug gamma-butyrolactone (GBH). 

The forewoman gave the jury’s findings, saying: ‘We, having listened to all given evidence, have determined that Robin Jamie Windsor completed suicide by ingestion of ethanol and GBH on February 19 2024 in Room 424 at The Hoxton Hotel.

‘We agree that the probable causes are an accumulation of many attributes to depression. Robin Jamie Windsor suffered from childhood trauma, he was vulnerable to rejection both emotionally and professionally.

‘We also agree that loneliness, the lack of emotional maturity, the pressure of mounting debts, the lack of consistent mental healthcare and support, and reoccurring heartache are all contributing factors of Robin Jamie Windsor’s mental health deterioration which in turn led him to take his own life.’

Dr van Dellen said after the jury’s conclusion: ‘I hope the family can take some comfort from the joy that Robin brought to so many people and the positive effect he had. That is a wonderful legacy.’

Addressing Windsor’s family at the front of the courtroom, the coroner added: ‘I hope you can think of the happy times he brought to the public and the deep affection the public held him in.’

Jurors were directed to record that the dancer had ‘completed suicide’ rather than ‘committed’ it. It is understood the term ‘committed’ is deemed inappropriate in an inquest as it could suggest a criminal act.

The court heard how after four years on Strictly, Windsor missed the 2014 series while he recovered from a back injury, which resulted in him needing surgery to remove a disc.

He was then one of three stars dropped in 2015 when show bosses chose to refresh the line-up. Friends said he ‘slipped deeper and deeper into endless depression’ and that his ‘obsession’ for the show was clear even years later.

Windsor partnered Emmerdale actress Lisa Riley in 2012 plus actress Patsy Kensit, 57, EastEnders legend Anita Dobson , 76, and Dragons’ Den star Deborah Meaden, 67, during his time on the BBC One show.

Ms Riley, 49, in a written statement yesterday, spoke of Windsor’s reaction after he was dropped from Strictly. She said: ‘It was from this moment on to the time of his death, he kept slipping deeper into a depression. His glow had gone.’

She said he had told her of times of ‘never feeling good enough’ and added: ‘He opened up telling me of the horrific time he was molested by an old dance tutor and felt his parents never really understood this.’

Ms Riley said Windsor was insecure about his body and took steroids which, combined with alcohol, would put him in a bad place. She claimed he was ‘drowning in debts’ and ‘frantically’ spent on designer items he could not afford.

Describing Windsor as her ‘rock’ when her mother died, Ms Riley revealed how her last contact with him came during Christmas 2023 after she saw him share a ‘really dark’ post on Facebook.

She said: ‘I texted him straight away and he replied he was ‘fine, just usual ups and downs of life’.’

Strictly professional Kristina Rihanoff, 48, who debuted alongside Windsor in 2010, sobbed as she told the inquest how he ‘changed significantly’ after his back injury.

She explained that not being able to do what he loved had a ‘very severe’ psychological impact on him and that the show was a ‘very lonely space with not much support’.

Ms Rihanoff added it was ‘heartbreaking’ to see him ‘deeply sad, subdued and burdened’.

Dr van Dellen also read parts of a written statement by X Factor star and Windsor’s ex-boyfriend Marcus Collins, who said Windsor’s mental health had deteriorated when he was released from his contract with Strictly.

‘The day that he was informed that he was no longer required for Strictly really broke his spirit,’ Collins said.

‘I will never forget it as we were on holiday in New York and he was inconsolable.

‘Robin’s mental health was challenged almost constantly from this point and at times it altered his personality.’

Actor Terry Gleed, who appeared alongside Windsor in a production of Aladdin at the Marina Theatre in Lowestoft in December 2023, said his co-star was ‘obsessed’ with Strictly.

He told the inquest that the dancer, who played the Genie in the pantomime, would sit on the sidelines watching footage of the current series of the show on his phone during rest time.

‘He was looking at his phone continuously, and I could feel he really wanted to be there… he missed it dearly,’ Gleed told jurors.

Choreographer Scott Coldwell, who worked with Windsor on a dance show with Strictly stars called Here Come The Boys, said Windsor told him several times that he was ‘desperate’ to go back on the hit BBC show.

In a written statement, Meaden said she last saw Windsor about a year before he died when they met for dinner, jurors previously heard.

Meaden said she was aware Windsor had experienced relationship difficulties and she had seen him ‘tearful and distracted at times’.

The businesswoman said that when she last saw him Windsor had said he planned to be on his own and put less emphasis on relationships, but Meaden said she was not sure she believed him.

Jurors also heard that Windsor had been struggling with an on-off relationship – which ended in August 2023 – with actor Ollie Augustin, who he met when they were in a stage show called Come What May, a tribute to Moulin Rouge.

Windsor was meant to feature in the Legends Of The Dance Floor tour alongside fellow dancers Brendan Cole, James Jordan, Pasha Kovalev and Ian Waite in late 2024.

He had been discussing the project with Mr Coldwell days before his death.

‘Legends (the show) was going to be something that regenerated the careers (of the dancers),’ Mr Coldwell said, as he recalled a phone call on February 1 2024.

He told the court: ‘My last call (with Windsor) was very positive.’

The choreographer became emotional when he recalled the last time they spoke.

Speaking about Windsor’s Mr Coldwell said: ‘He did say he was desperate to go back on the show. He understood it wasn’t a possibility, but I feel he appealed to go back a couple of times but clearly those weren’t successful.’

Tazi Amey, a friend of Windsor who was a stage manager on the Aladdin pantomime, said they would go for drinks after rehearsals every day.

She became emotional as she recalled a conversation where he talked to her about the song he would play at his funeral.

‘He said he had been to some dark places,’ she said. ‘We were talking about music. He said he knew what song he wanted for his funeral. It was Only the Good Die Young.’

Windsor had dated singer Marcus Collins, 37, who featured on The X Factor in 2011.

He was previously engaged to ex-partner Davide Cini and proposed on a romantic New York helicopter ride in 2013 before splitting years later.

A BBC spokesperson said: ‘Our sympathies are with Robin’s family, friends, and all who knew him. The whole of the Strictly Come Dancing family remain deeply saddened by his passing. Robin was a much loved member of the team – both on and off air – during his time on the show.

‘As the inquest has heard this week and the jury concluded, several complex factors contributed to how Robin felt at the time of his tragic death and our thoughts remain with all who knew and loved Robin.’

For confidential support, call Samaritans on 116 123, visit samaritans.org or visit https://www.thecalmzone.net/get-support