A dating expert has explained the real reasons why so many teachers have illicit romances with their pupils.
Grim case studies of educators being struck off for having sex with students seem to be growing both in the UK and US. But why are there so many examples of these illegal affairs being pursued in so many schools around the globe?
Earlier this year, Lancashire-based teacher Matthew Gilkes was jailed after he took more than a million upskirt images of pupils using secret cameras hidden in pens.
In March, 36-year-old Ashley Fisler from New Jersey, in the US, was arrested after being accused of sleeping with a student twice in 2021. In April, Fisler was remanded in custody while she awaits trial.
And in January this year Simon Taylor – who lost his leg while serving for the army in Afghanistan – was jailed after he “targeted and groomed” a girl at Hethersett Academy in Norfolk.
Relationship expert Lauren Salaun explained that teachers and students are fighting an uphill battle to stay clear of unwanted incidents, because of the “authority/subordinate” relationship dynamic.
She highlighted how many pupils develop crushes on their teacher. “Teacher figures often embody qualities people are naturally drawn to – confidence, leadership, protection, validation, or stability,” she said.
“There’s also often an inherent level of trust given to authority figures, which can cause people to lower their guard, become more emotionally impressionable, and feel a stronger sense of connection or safety around them, which can cause boundaries to more easily blur.
“In environments like schools, those dynamics become even more emotionally heightened because there’s already an imbalance of power and dependency involved.”
Salaun explained why teachers abuse their power and start to fancy their pupils – and how this can be stopped.
“Beyond policies, I also think there needs to be much more education around boundaries, attachment, and power dynamics,” Salaun said. “Because many of these situations develop gradually over time.”
She added: “One of the most important things is to have clear black and white rules in these types of settings for yourself. For example, if you’re a college faculty or staff, a good rule would be absolutely no dating or romantic relationships with any students at your college, even if you’re both adults (and vise versa).
“The biggest thing is recognising those blurred boundaries early. Once emotional intimacy started to bleed into professional boundaries, that’s usually when problems begin.
“For authority figures especially, it’s important not to seek emotional validation, support, or excitement from someone they hold power over. And for subordinates, it’s important to recognise that emotional intensity is not always the same thing as healthy intimacy.”