‘Girlfriend is having wonderful intercourse with one other lady – my mates will say I turned her homosexual’

If you have a problem that needs solving and you don’t know where to turn, look no further.

Every day, the Daily Star’s very own agony aunt Jane O’Gorman is on hand to tackle your issues and concerns with some straight-talking but sound advice.

From bedroom confessions to self-confidence issues , drug use and everything else, Jane has helped thousands of Daily Star readers over the years and isn’t slowing down.

If you want help, you can write to Just Jane, Daily Star, One Canada Square, London, E145AP or email [email protected]. Please note that Jane cannot respond to individual letters and not all problems will be published.

All my fault

My partner has fallen in love with another woman. She’s moved into her flat and tells me she’s never been happier or more sexually satisfied.

Where do I go from here? My mates will have a field day with this one. I’ll be pilloried and laughed at from morning to night. I’m due on a stag weekend next month. It’s cost me a fortune so I can’t drop out, but I know that my pals will have a field day. I’ll be called every name under the sun. I know them and they’ll accuse me of turning my wife gay with my crappy bedroom moves. I could almost write the script in advance. What did I do to deserve this level of humiliation?

I thought I was a good partner. When she and I were together, I provided, I was loving and kind. She used to credit me with saving her from her horrible ex-husband by giving her stability and a safe place to stay. She never told me she fancied women. Our old neighbours were lesbians, and she never showed any interest in them.

We were together for 7 years – did my love mean nothing to her? Was it all fake?

My love rival is someone she works with. Apparently, they fell in love on a team-building weekend in Leeds. Now they’re an item and I’m on my knees. We live in a small community, and it’ll only be a matter of time before everyone knows our news.

I’ve known my mates since school and they’re not what you might call enlightened or modern. If I’m honest, it’s them and my best mate in particular that I’m most worried about.

My ex left me a ‘goodbye’ letter on her exit in, which she encouraged me to wish her well and stand up for myself. But how can I when she’s made me look an utter loser?

JANE SAYS: You must accept that the rest of your life starts here.

You can do anything, go anywhere, and fulfil your potential as a single, healthy guy.

It’s incredibly upsetting that your ex-partner has moved on and you find yourself alone. But you didn’t ‘make’ her gay. She has found an individual that she likes and admires and has chosen to live with her instead.

It happens all the time; relationships end, and people leave us. Of course, you’re shocked and upset but no one ever said that life was predictable or fair. I hate the idea of you obsessing over your small-minded mates and what ‘hilarious’ things they might have to say for themselves.

Do you really have to go on that stag do? Could you get your money back or write it off?

If not, then tell them in advance that you’re hurting right now and not interested in any wise cracks or jokes.

Sadly, if your so-called best mate is cruel and unsympathetic, then you’ll have to consider whether you and he can have any kind of relationship beyond the trip. To my mind he sounds spiteful and nasty; someone who has delighted in constantly bringing you down over the years. Am I right?

I know things seem bleak right now but try and look at the future as a wide-open book. What’s stopping you from changing jobs, moving to a new place, and making your dreams come true?

Maybe your ex has done you a favour? You need to write your own future.

Puppy love

My daughter (32) thinks more of her dog than me. She’s obsessed with the mutt. She won’t go on holiday or even out for meal because she doesn’t like leaving her.

Recently I was ill, and she wouldn’t come over because SHE had a bad paw. I was deeply insulted. When did I fall so far down the pecking order?

JANE SAYS: You need to accept your daughter has her own life and priorities. You may resent the dog, but if she makes her happy, then that’s that.

Try not to feel resentful of bitter. Busy yourself with your own friends and other family members.

It may not seem fair, but your daughter is entitled to do what she wants – she doesn’t have to answer to you or jump to when you call.