If you have a problem that needs solving and you don’t know where to turn, look no further.
Every day, the Daily Star’s very own agony aunt Jane O’Gorman is on hand to tackle your issues and concerns with some straight-talking but sound advice.
From bedroom confessions to self-confidence issues , drug use and everything else, Jane has helped thousands of Daily Star readers over the years and isn’t slowing down.
If you want help, you can write to Just Jane, Daily Star, One Canada Square, London, E145AP or email jane.ogorman@reachplc.com. Please note that Jane cannot respond to individual letters and not all problems will be published.
She says I’m ugly
My girlfriend becomes horrible when drunk.
She turns on me. She tells me I’m ugly and stupid and useless in bed. Going out with her is becoming a nightmare. We went to a riverside pub on the recent Bank Holiday Monday, and I was ashamed of her.
She drank too much, too quickly and then humiliated me. We were with three other couples. She ‘joked’ about my clothes, modest earnings and pathetic car. Then she brought up sex. She was playing to the crowd as she described me as ‘disappointing in the bedroom’.
She spat that she hadn’t orgasmed with me in months and that her trusty vibrator was the only thing keeping her sane.
Our friends could see how upset I was, but she wouldn’t leave it. In the end they all left early.
Are we doomed?
JANE SAYS: If your relationship has been going through a tricky patch, then your girl should have requested a private conversation behind closed doors. For her to belittle you in public was crass and unforgiveable. Sometimes we just have to accept that a relationship is dead and buried.
Explain to her that she went too far and that you’re done. You have your own future and wellbeing to think of now. You can’t allow another ill-mannered individual to bring you down and destroy your dignity and reputation. If she thinks she can do better, then send her on her way.
Secret past
As a younger man I drank, smoked and shagged my way around the world. I was in security for a number of bands and enjoyed wild times. Does my new lady need to hear the gory details? She’s classy and lovely. The complete opposite of my former conquests.
The fun ended when I fell off a stage in the US and was forced to fly home. I’m paranoid that she’ll hear the embarrassing deets from someone else.
JANE SAYS: Your lady must already know what a rock band gets up to on the road. She can’t be that innocent…
It’s important to get your relationship off on the right foot. Tell her that you’ve got a couple of things you’d like to make clear. Own your past. Explain about the drink, drugs and sex so that there are no nasty surprises.
The chances are that she was attracted to you in the first place because you have a certain air or edge. Who knows? Maybe she was a bit of player too? Obviously, you need to reassure her that you’re now perfectly clean and aren’t going to be sleeping around, taking drugs or drinking to access again in future.
Honesty is the best policy.
Funny ha ha
My boyfriend thinks it’s funny to send explicit of himself to my friends. He claims that everyone does it and it’s just a laugh. He admits that he gets a thrill from ‘putting himself out there’.
The problem is that a couple of my friends don’t see the funny side and are threatening to cause trouble. How can I stop this?
JANE SAYS: Your boyfriend is an idiot. Sending unsolicited images (cyberflashing) is illegal. This is not about your friends ‘causing trouble’ this is about him being bone headed and inappropriate. Tell him to stop while you consider your future without him.
He is a liability and not good enough for you. You risk being dragged down by his ignorance and stupid habit.