If you have a problem that needs solving and you don’t know where to turn, look no further.
Every day, the Daily Star’s very own agony aunt Jane O’Gorman is on hand to tackle your issues and concerns with some straight-talking but sound advice.
From bedroom confessions to self-confidence issues , drug use and everything else, Jane has helped thousands of Daily Star readers over the years and isn’t slowing down.
If you want help, you can write to Just Jane, Daily Star, One Canada Square, London, E145AP or email jane.ogorman@reachplc.com. Please note that Jane cannot respond to individual letters and not all problems will be published.
Suck it up
My girlfriend is obsessed with the fact I have large sums of money in various savings accounts. Does she stay with me because she loves me or because I’m loaded? It’s a question I ask myself a dozen times a day. When we first started dating in January 2024 I kept my inheritance from her.
I didn’t tell her that my late childless uncle (he was also my Godfather) had sold a successful business before his death and left the majority of his fortune to me.
She just thought I was an ordinary fella, and we jogged along quite adequately. A few weeks ago, however, I accidently left various statements on the kitchen counter, and she caught sight of the total on one of my many bank accounts. She was stunned.
She fronted me up and asked me if there was anything else about me she needed to know. Like a fool, I confessed that I have plenty of cash and never need to work ever again (even though I choose to for my mental and physical health).
The change in her attitude was almost instantaneous; a smile spread across her face and she’s been sucking up to me like crazy ever since. Whereas our sex life used to be so-so, now it’s red hot and edgy. I get anything I ask for and her accommodating smile never waivers.
The other night, just to test her, I woke her up at midnight and announced that I fancied online sex with a stranger. Would she mind firing up the laptop and finding someone sexy on a paying website? And she did.
She didn’t complain once even when I was talking dirty to a stranger and touching myself. She even made me a milky drink to help me get back to sleep. Any time I attempt to argue with her she immediately backs down and tells me that I’m: “Absolutely right” and apologises.
It concerns me that she’s not genuine.
JANE SAYS: I really hate the idea of your putting your girlfriend ‘to the test’. What gave you the right to wake her up and humiliate her in the middle of the night?
So, what if you fancied on-line sex with a professional sex-worker? It was a cheap shot. Where is your respect? Yes, I get it that you are rich, but where are your manners? There’s no getting away from the fact that money is a massive aphrodisiac.
Your girlfriend is only human and, obviously, suddenly realising that you’re minted has made her look at you in a whole new light. Was that kitchen counter/statement incident really an accident or were you keen to come clean/show off about your financial position? I do wonder. T
he fact is that you can’t play games with this girl. It’s not fair to take advantage or get her at it.
Talk to her today and make it clear that you need to start again on a level playing field.
She must explain her true feelings for you, and you must stop playing the big ‘I am’.
The reality is that she won’t be able to keep that smile up forever if she doesn’t care for you. Equally you can’t allow your money to make you paranoid or distrust everyone around you. It’s wonderful that you have this financial cushion, now start being an adult about it.
With wealth comes responsibility. What about some maturity?
Nasty individual
I’ve recently become very close to one of the mum’s at my son’s school. She’s fantastic, but her husband is vile. Any time I meet him, he’s smarmy and condescending. Other people have warned me that he knocks her around and keeps her short of money.
Twice now I’ve seen my friend with marks on her face, which she’s put down to ‘banging into a door’. Should I get involved?
JANE SAYS: You can’t stand back if you suspect that a good friend of yours is being abused. Tell her that you’re worried and give her the number of The National Domestic Abuse Helpline (0808 2000 247) when it is safe to do so.
Also urge her to dial 999 if she’s ever needs to. She may well tell you to get stuffed, but at least if she has the number, then there is hope.