If you have a problem that needs solving and you don’t know where to turn, look no further.
Every day, the Daily Star’s very own agony aunt Jane O’Gorman is on hand to tackle your issues and concerns with some straight-talking but sound advice.
If you want help, you can write to Just Jane, Daily Star, One Canada Square, London, E145AP or email jane.ogorman@reachplc.com. Please note that Jane cannot respond to individual letters and not all problems will be published.
Coffee and cake
I’ve been having a fling with one of the dads from my son’s class. His wife is the main breadwinner and he’s a bored house husband. He started popping round here after drop-off in June.
At first, it was just a coffee and cake, then it became bonking on the sofa and romping in my bed.
Now we’re in the middle of the summer holidays and I’m panicking. He’s become obsessed with me. He’s sexting me fifty times a day.
He says he’s fallen madly in love and will leave his wife at the drop of a hat.
But I don’t want to leave my husband for him.
I never meant for things to go so far. How do I get him to back off and cool it?
JANE SAYS: It’s vital that you put an end to this drama right now.
It’s vital you contact this man and tell him that he’s got it all wrong. You’re not interested in an affair, a relationship or even a casual friendship. He is married and so are you. End of.
Ask him to understand where you’re coming from; to respect your position and to keep things cordial and respectful when you both return to the playground in September. You need to take responsibility for this because you invited him into your house – and your bed. Does your husband deserve to hear the truth before someone else blabs? We all know how gossipy school playgrounds are…
Mow the lawn
My girl wants us to give up our jobs and go travelling. She fancies white water rafting, ballooning, and sky diving. But what I really want is to settle down and start a family. I crave a house to fix up and children to love.
I like the idea of putting down roots.
Two of my mates recently married and have moved to the suburbs. Bliss.
Meanwhile my girl is looking up shark cages and scuba and we’re on different pages. I’m afraid that if I tell the truth that she’ll dump me.
JANE SAYS: There’s nothing wrong with wanting to be a father. But it’s not right to keep stringing your girlfriend along.
If you have no intention of joining her on this big trip then start being honest, now, so that she knows where she stands. Your relationship is at a crossroads. Is this where you finally go in different directions? That said, is she interested in going on the big adventure and then settling down or do you and she finally need to admit that you are not suited and set each other free? There is no right and wrong in this situation but holding out on her isn’t fair.
Hands off
Every time I bump into my ex-boyfriend, he suggests sex. He’s very ‘hands on’ and, sometimes, I give in.
He says I’m the only one for him even though he’s engaged to someone new. I know his new partner from my old job. Does she deserve to hear the truth about the rat she’s planning to marry?
JANE SAYS: How come you keep ‘bumping into’ this ex-lover?
Are you sure he’s not stalking you?
Be in no doubt, he knows exactly what he’s doing and he’s pushing his luck. Warn him to keep away from you. If he doesn’t then not only will you report him to his new lover, but also the police.
Why did you break up with him in the first place?