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Sob story
I held a birthday party last month to celebrate my 30th. At the end, an old mate was still hanging around. She helped me to clear up and then admitted that she had nowhere to sleep.
She said that she was homeless and broke. Could I help? Her boyfriend had thrown her out and she was desperate for a bed. Of course, I took pity on her and said she could sleep in our loft room for as long as she liked. The next day I went to my office leaving her in the care of my boyfriend who works from home…
One night I returned home at 7pm to find the pair of them snuggled up on the sofa necking a bottle of red wine. I told my boyfriend to behave himself and he looked at me as if butter wouldn’t melt.
Over the next few weeks, I continued to work, cook, and clear up while they drank – and flirted. Eventually I blew my top. I accused them of being selfish and taking advantage. They looked sheepish and said “sorry”, but 24 hours later I caught them bonking in the bathroom.
She was topless and pleasuring him in a way I’ve always refused to do… I started throwing toiletries at them. They yelled that I was crazy, so I threw some more. I stomped round to my parents’ house and left them to it.
Now she’s at her sister’s place and my guy is joining her there. He says he can’t help it; they’re in love.
He’s moving out this weekend. He’s convinced that things will work out with her long term and that he and I don’t have any kind of future. This is a living nightmare. I trusted her and now they’ve both let me down.
My parents are trying to make me feel better by saying that they never liked him, but that doesn’t help. What did I ever do to deserve this?
JANE SAYS: You offered a desperate ‘friend’ a safe place to lay her head, but now she’s stolen your man and you’re upset and angry. I can perfectly understand that you feel shocked and very let down.
I urge you to keep cool and retain your dignity. You’ve been betrayed and humiliated, but you cannot allow your ex-mate and, soon to be ex-bloke, to break you. Explain to your parents that their comments may be well-meaning, but they’re not helpful.
Apologise for snapping at them because there’s no point in hurting the ones who genuinely love and care for you. Sadly, everything is up in the air right now.
Your ‘friend’ is a slug, and your boyfriend is halfway out the door. Good luck to them.
Console yourself with the thought that if he was so quick to cheat and deceive you, then he couldn’t have been much of a catch in the first place.
Cry your eyes out, thump your pillow and then vow to bounce back. Turn to friends and family for support and put this behind you. Stay strong and be ready just in case your cheating boyfriend attempts to come crawling back to you in the coming weeks or months.
He doesn’t deserve a second chance because he messed on his own doorstep and has put you through too much.