‘My lover promised me he’d stopped sleeping along with his spouse – now she’s pregnant’
JUST JANE: Today our agony aunt Jane O’Gorman is dealing with a new issue from a disappointed Daily Star reader whose whole world has been turned upside down
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Pregnant pause
My married lover has announced that his wife is pregnant.
I feel stupid. I feel used. We fell in love in 2022 and, on our very first date, he swore that he would never sleep with her again. He even sent me a picture of the tiny spare room he’d been relegated to.
Yet it now appears that they’ve carried on having sex all the time – sometimes twice a day because he ‘couldn’t get out of it’. Yeah, right…
Apparently, this pregnancy was an ‘accident’. She’d told him she was on the Pill, but she’s keeping the baby. Now he doesn’t know when he’ll be able to move in with me. Where do I go from here when I’d banked on him being my future? I’d started looking at places for us to rent together in spring 2026.
JANE SAYS: You can’t waste any more time on a man who lies and cheats. Not only has your lover let you down, but he’s deceived the woman who is married too, the woman who is now having his baby.
Too many years have been wasted waiting for him. Are you going to hang around another 18 years, while his child grows up?
Cut your losses and make new plans. Of course, you feel used and foolish but at least this is a definite sign that he is selfish and can’t be trusted. Don’t ever allow him to sweet talk you into giving him ‘another chance’ because you can’t be anyone’s guilty secret as you’re worth better than this.
Potty parents annoy me
My parents have always smoked pot. They consider themselves a pair of old hippies.
Now that they’re both retired, they’re using even more. Their house is thick with fumes. I’ve told them I won’t allow my children to visit because I don’t think the atmosphere is healthy.
This has created a huge storm with my parents branding me selfish and uptight. Am I?
JANE SAYS: You must do whatever is right for your children. You’re not presuming to tell your parents how to behave in the privacy of their own home, you’re simply anticipating future health and safety issues.
They can brand you anything they like but your children rely on you to protect them. That said, do you parents need to chat to their GP regarding their growing reliance on the drug?
They need to know that you are concerned about their well-being and won’t simply stand back if you can see that they are gripped.
He expects me to cough up
I’m in a new relationship with a hot guy. I’m spending a lot of time at his place. I always take food and drink whenever I’m with him.
Now he’s suggested I should pay half of his TV and game subscriptions too because I benefit from these. Is he going to start charging me for water, gas, electricity and lighting next?
JANE SAYS: Presumably your guy was already paying out for particular subscriptions before you came along. If you feel he’s asking too much of you, then go back to basics with an honest conversation.
It’s good that you contribute with food and drink but if you do push up his utility bills by hanging out at his gaff then discuss this. Only you can decide if this relationship is healthy and fair.
