‘Kinky intercourse with married couple subsequent door has was a nightmare’
JUST JANE: Today our agony aunt Jane O’Gorman is dealing with a new issue from a Daily Star reader who feels obliged to entertain her horny neighbours
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Sucked in
I have sex with the husband-and-wife couple next door. The problem is that they are becoming increasingly demanding. What started off as a bit of fun in 2023 is now a nightmare.
The wife is extremely tricky. One minute she accuses her hubby of paying me too much attention, the next she claims to be in love with me.
He is a cheeky devil who demands increasingly kinky sex, which is awkward and weird as I’m not always in the mood for games. She says I’m her best friend then pressures me into lending her money.
I live right next to them in a block of flats. They bang on my door whenever they feel horny or bored. I feel like a pawn stuck in the middle of their dysfunctional marriage, yet anytime I try to break away, they beg me not to leave them. Help.
JANE SAYS: You’ve got to be strong. Tell your frisky neighbours ‘no more’ and get on with your business. It sounds as if they’re guilty of sucking the life out of you. Remember that you don’t exist to entertain or titivate them.
Swinging with them might have been fun at the start but this is now an unhealthy situation. If they can’t make their marriage work, then that’s got nothing to do with you. Every minute you spend hanging out at their place is another minute wasted. What about partners, lovers and proper friends of your own?
Stuck in the middle
My mother is furious that my father (her ex-husband) is getting married again next month and that we’re all going to his wedding. I’m being called ‘cruel’ for allowing my sons to be ushers. The ridiculous thing is that my parents haven’t spoken for years.
I have offered to pay for her and her new partner to visit a restaurant on the day of the ceremony, but she’s acting like a brat. I can’t respect the fuss she’s making. How do I stop myself from falling out with her?
JANE SAYS: Find the time to talk to her face-to-face. Admit that you understand that she is hurting, but add that you are supporting your father, because you want to – and you don’t have to justify that. She has been offered an alternative activity for the day, so she needs to stop making everything about her. There are inevitably conflicts after a divorce, but she does herself no credit by making a sensitive situation even worse.
If she loves you, then she’ll realise that you already have enough on your plate. If she’s genuinely ill or unhappy, then she needs to speak to her GP but, hopefully, this drama will end once the wedding has passed. Accept that your mother feels left out and jealous. She’s complex – just like the rest of us.
Past imperfect
Before I met my current partner I was with a series of unsuitable lovers. I bonked bad boys, married men and sleazebags. For too many years I behaved badly and let myself down.
The day I met my current guy I decided to re-write history. The problem is that I’ve told so many lies regarding my past, that I don’t know what the truth is anymore. I keep tripping myself up. I also live in fear of one of my mates or relatives blurting out a horrible story. Christmas is coming and my best mate is planning a huge party.
The stress is getting to me. Must I tell him the whole truth about my sordid past?
JANE SAYS: If your past is bugging you and you’re struggling to function, then you need to tell your partner that you’d like a chat. Unburdening ourselves can be hugely cathartic.
The fact is that you can only tell him what you can remember so don’t get hung up on details. The chances are that nothing is as bad as you think and that he’ll admit that he was just as bad himself – if not worse.
Ultimately, however, your past is your business, and you’re not obliged to say anything to anyone.
