‘My drunk mate pleasured a visitor underneath the desk at our wedding ceremony then trashed resort’
If you have a problem that needs solving and you don’t know where to turn, look no further.
Every day, the Daily Star’s very own agony aunt Jane O’Gorman is on hand to tackle your issues and concerns with some straight-talking but sound advice.
From bedroom confessions to self-confidence issues , drug use and everything else, Jane has helped thousands of Daily Star readers over the years and isn’t slowing down.
If you want help, you can write to Just Jane, Daily Star, One Canada Square, London, E145AP or email [email protected]. Please note that Jane cannot respond to individual letters and not all problems will be published.
They trashed the joint
I can’t forgive my friends for behaving like idiots at my wedding, I married my husband, the love of my life, in July. I spent a fortune, but my five mates rocked up half cut.
They proceeded to drink and heckle during the speeches and the meal. My oldest mate snogged a waiter, another attempted to give her ex-boyfriend oral sex under a table, while a third got off with my cousin right in front of his wife.
Then my pals had a party in one of the hotel bedrooms and trashed the joint. The next morning, at breakfast, all the other guests were talking about them. No one has apologised to me. I’m 35.
JANE SAYS: Maybe you finally must accept that they’re not true friends at all. Yes, we all like to let our hair down and have a laugh, but we don’t have sex under tables and wreck hotel rooms during our mid-thirties – or do we?
The fact is that your mates aren’t children. They’re all adults yet they behaved like a bunch of brats. You’re embarking on a whole new life and must decide if these people are going to be a part of your future. I feel that you’ve outgrown them. Sadly, if no one has apologised, then they clearly don’t believe that they did anything wrong.
Try not to be bitter or angry. Go forward with your new husband and accept that that was then and this is now – and that a line has been crossed.
High sex drive
My man can’t go for one day without sex.
He insists he has a physical need for a daily intercourse otherwise he gets ill. If I go away, next month, with my friends for a late holiday, then he’ll have no choice but to pick up other lovers in our area. I’m terrified that he’ll do this. Why can’t he just give his libido a rest and chill out for five days I’m going to be away?
JANE SAYS: Your controlling boyfriend sounds toxic.
If he isn’t happy with you spending a few days with your mates without making horrible threats and comments, then he’s not worth bothering with.
Of course he’s entitled to miss you, but threatening to get off with other women is manipulative and cruel.
I’m sure he has got a high sex drive, but nothing gives him the right to lay any form of emotional blackmail at your door.
You must remember that there is a whole world out there – away from his selfish clutches – and unless you stand up for yourself and plan your exit then you’ll be permanently supervised and trapped.
Money and class
I fancy older women. I like middle-aged divorcees and widows who have money and class.
I can’t stand girls of my own age (30+). I find them vain and boring. I check out dating sites that point me towards grateful, experienced women – and conduct my private life that way. I’m sick of my mates calling me a freak. Am I?
JANE SAYS: As long as you’re not hurting your lovers or ripping anyone off, you’re free to date anyone you like.
I do find it interesting that you mention money as an attractive quality…
Do remember that older women my not wish to have any more children. As for your ‘mates’ who are they judge? Suggest they get on with their lives while you get on with yours.
